soon.

xxxii.

̶ ̶  xxxii. I HOPE HE LIKES IT.

the shadow to my light

i feel you pushing yourself away
and i'm left fighting this one sided love
with tears carving themselves into my swollen cheeks
hoping that if you saw the pain of you no longer saying i love you and meaning it
things would change

i can't make you love me
as unfortunate as it is
but i still love you
as unfortunate as it sounds

and i'm tied between digging my nails into your heart
 and watching it explode like a grenade in my hands

or giving it back to you over morning coffee
watching you pack your things
and leaving the apartment we shared

this love has faded
yet i'm still lost in the existence 
as if you never let go in the first place

come back,

please

don't leave me in the dark with myself 
to carry this pain on my spine 
and wear it like a dress
with a smile
that convinces you i'm fine
but me otherwise

please
tell me

you still feel an us.
or is this love just another gift life has given to death to cherish forever?