Boss Panther is stuck on a Rimworld with a bunch of lousy pirates. Basically, his camp is the source of all your haulers/organ farms/human meat/target practice. War Comedy.
We found some computer components and magnetic coils from a trader that died somehow. One of the crew with medical experience says he wasn't shot or stabbed, but he didn't recognize the bite marks. No animal here made those marks. Wonderful. Well, tough luck for this guy. We got the stuff we need for hauler bots. The crew's gonna love this! No more backbreaking labor! I think we should bust out the good Whiz Sake when we get it working.
Day 88
Written on Day 89
Winto and the ship engineers did it! These /fuckers\ heavy ass things are up and moving around after initial programming or whatever. It's kinda hypnotic watching then waddle here and there on their clunky legs. Reminds me of guys with peg legs.
After Hauler-bot 1 finished its first haul, it fell down and did the Worm flop. Luckily it was just a terrain /prad\ prediction error or something. So we busted out the Sake and had a good time. PrincessPeach36 was her usually freaky self. She loves the booze, that girl.
More escape pods arrived and interrupted our party. I was a bit messed up and started calling the old folks Younglings like the beer. They didn't like that, so I sent them to the caves to dig out some more space in the barracks.
Someone programmed the hauler-bots to bring us beer if we say "Zootie, Beer me". Whomever you are, you are a god amongst men.
Day 90
We've got 85 people here. Food's running low again. I'm sending over everyone decent at growing to SouthernLion's drug colony since winter has started here and she's got indoor growing fields almost ready. She says she might start hunting parties as well. Says I've got enough coats and gloves to continue to send raids.
Crap! SouthernLion is under attack! A swarm of red colored guys are attacking her colony! It's the Federation! There's like 30 of those guys!
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I'm in a drop pod as I write this, flying over to the colony. Should get there in the hour. I've loaded up with guns, meds, and as many guys as I can fit into 10 drop pods. I radioed my /assholes\"Friends" at The OnePiece Pirate Clan led by my former 2nd. They agreed to send help but they wanted 1,000 silver. You cheap chizzlers, I wanted to shove my hand through the radio and choke him till his face turned blue!
Enough complaints. I have to think of a battle strategy before I land.
Night
So here's what happened: As soon as we arrived, OnePiece and Tort McCourt showed up, saying that he wants to be paid first. So I threw the money over him and made his cheap ass go fetch it. His guys were mad; not at us but the Feds. They've been fighting these guys for awhile.
I took up position in the psychite fields while my troops armed up and guarded the door. Tort McCourt went to the northern wall, to look for a way to flank. SouthernLion put her guys by the southern door to guard that position. It's been a while since I saw her, and she still looks good, though she enjoys the smokeleaf a bit more than in the past.
They sent a buncha drones at us. My guys at the door quickly shot them down, but they got too close to the door. They exploded, all together. Two of my guys went down, and so did the part of the wall. The shots came next, snipers in the distance. Lost four more guys and then they rushed forward and left. Their armor was tough. Wish SouthernLion had invested more in gun turrets, tbh.
Then the plasma artillery started raining on us. Our northern wall fell quickly and so did most of Tort's men. They started firing through the gap. I ordered a retreat to head into the buildings. SouthernLion wanted to preserve the fields but I dragged her with me, saying that they'll grow back once we beat the bastards but we can't win in the open field. A sniper round barely missed my face. They must have Smart guns as well because no way a shot from that far out and such a bad angle would come that close.
SO I changed the battlefield, made them go through our chokepoints to find us. The strategy worked for awhile. SouthernLion and her team and I cut 10 of them down in the indoor growing field.
Their plasma artillery cut through the roof like a hot knife through butter. So we had to flee, no time to extinguish the fires. Saw Tort fighting with a new kinda sword alone against 3 of them. I was about to help when I saw them coming. The mech suits, called Federators. They were like 10 feet tall and loaded with weapons, crimson paint for the blood of their victims. They tore threw most of my and Tort's men like tissue paper. Fortunately they grouped up almost single file. One of SouthernLion's boys had the triple rocket launcher. That blast softened them up, and our combined bullets took them out fast afterwards.
After the Federators went down, you'd figure that maybe the rest would give up and leave. But they kept fighting, even more furiously. One group fought us to a standstill while another group went around sabotaging the place. They wrecked our generators, knocking our remaining turrets offline. I smelled something burning- they torched the healroot and yayo stockpiles.
With their smart guns giving them an advantage, I ordered everyone to charge and fight hand to hand while I cover them from my position. Those damn shock sticks of theirs took out our men on every swing. Too bad their space armor can't stand 3 charge shots and a SouthernLion's shotgun blast to the face.
They fought to literally the last man. This place, this Rimworld, I guess this is the best we can hope for in life here: To die over $3.99 somkeleaf against puritanical raiders.
After the battle we looked over the damage. Every indoor growing area was burned by plasma fire, our generators wrecked, fridge destroyed, 3/4ths of the growers dead. Stockpiles burned.
SouthernLion and I talked about this for a half-hour before I decided to sell the land to Tort. He wanted it, since it was closer to him and he had the resources to sink into it, which we no longer do. I quickly negotiated the deal while she treated her wounds and punched dead peacekeepers back to death. She's something when she's angry.
We're heading back in drop pods with a bunch of Feddy rifles and weapons, some food, our silver, and the remainder of the growers. We will rebuild from this I say, but SouthernLion's not listening to me anymore. She really wanted to try again, rebuild from the ashes. But we don't have the resources to protect her colony against another attack like that.
I should be happy we got out of there alive, but I'm not. We've lost a great money source today, and so I'll have to find another way to make ends meet. And there are so many mouths to feed now.
