I May or May Not Have an Evil Plan

I May or May Not Be Younger than Normalstar [Epilogue]

Missingfur limps in view of the camera, using a cane and an annoyed expression on his face

Missingfur: Welcome to episode 3467, where we STILL haven't killed Normalstar...

Velvetleaf: Don't be so gloomy! At least I'm not your apprentice anymore!

Missingfur: That's because I'm an ELDER now, you mouse-brain.

Velvetleaf: Oh, right.

Missingfur: But that doesn't matter! Because today I have the most BRILLIANT plan! I'll just wait for Normalstar to die!

There is a silence.

Velvetleaf: THAT'S your plan?

Missingfur: Yes.

Velvetleaf: ...

Missingfur: ANYway, since Normalstar is twenty moons older than me and is FINALLY on his last life, he should die ANY TIME now! *wheezes* Especially since I feel like I'M going to die...

Lilywhisper: HELP HELP NORMALSTAR IS DYING OF OLD AGE!

MIssingfur: Wait, who's that? *scratches head with paw*

Velvetleaf: That's the new medicine cat, remember? Grumpyberry died moons ago.

Missingfur: Oh RIGHT...*smacks head angrily* Old age!

Lilywhisper: SOMEONE GO GRAB WATER PLEASE!!!

Sparkwhisker: *hobbles over* I'll do it...

Lilywhisper: ...but you're an elder.

Sparkwhisker: I'm still as spry as any cat!

Lilywhisper: ...fine then.

Sparkwhisker: YAY!

Sparkwhisper takes off like a bullet with the wad of moss, disappearing before Missingfur can even blink.

Missingfur: W-W-WHAT!!! How did he...

Lilywhisper: I just hope he gets back in time...

About ten minutes pass, and still no Sparkwhisker.

Normalstar: H-*cough* hey! Did you *cough cough* forget about me here?

Lilywhisper: Oh, right. *pads in the den* OH NO HE'S ON THE VERGE OF DEATH!!!

Missingfur: YES!

Flamebreeze: *suddenly running over* WAIT GUYS THIS IS MISSINGFUR'S FAULT! HE'S TRYING TO KILL NORMALSTAR!

Tallshadow: *pokes his head out of the elder's den* Sorry, I still don't care.

Flamebreeze: But NORMALSTAR--

Tallshadow: Don't care about him either.

Flamebreeze: AGH CAN'T YOU ALL SEE! MISSINGFUR WANTS TO--

Missingfur: How the HECK can I control old age?

Flamebreeze: ...oh. Right. BUT IT'S STILL--

Lilywhisper: NOOOO NORMALSTAR'S ON HIS LAST BREATH!!!!!!!

Everyone quickly pads into the medicine cat den to see Normalstar struggling for breath.

Missingfur: YESSS!!!!

Flamebreeze: GUYS, he--

Tallshadow: Don't care.

Lilywhisper: NOO NORMALSTAR DON'T DIE!!!!

Sparkwhisker suddenly knocks aside all the cats and presents soaking wet moss to Lilywhisper. She takes it, hissing at him.

Lilywhisper: WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?

Sparkwhisker shrugs, and Lilywhisker gives the moss to Normalstar who hurriedly laps it up. There is a flash of golden light, and Normalstar is young and healthy again.

All cats: O.O

Lilywhisper: YOU FOUND THE FABLED FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH???!!!

Quickly, all the cats go to the moss and take a lap. Each is returned to their former selves.

Missingfur: Oh! To be young again!

Velvetpaw: DARN IT I'm an apprentice again.

Flamepaw: Now DEFINITELY no one will listen to me...but at least I can LEARN!

Rainbownose: YAY! Everyone's happy!

More cats begin to praise StarClan, giving thanks that they are young once more. Suddenly...

Tallshadow: Don't care.

All the cats turn to look at him.

All cats in unison: WHAAAAAT??

Tallshadow shrugs and pads back to the warrior den, where he promptly falls asleep. After a moment, the others do the same, with only Missingfur still there. He is staring angrily after his brother.

Missingfur: Noooooooooooo! I was SO CLOSE!!!!! *in a low tone, ominous* I'll get you for this, Sparkwhisker. COUNT on it.

This very last chapter of IMOMNHAEP is brought to you by Ember :'(