Perfectly Imperfect | Lippa

"Holes." - Twenty-Eight

DATE: December 23, 2015

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   "Pippa, sweetie, I have to-"

   Pippa shook her head, cutting Renèe off. "No, please don't," she pleaded, grabbing on to her arm. "I-I don't want anymore drama..."

   Renèe bit her bottom lip, letting out a sigh of defeat. "Fine. I won't slap him-"

   "No, no, just.." She paused, thinking for a moment. "Just don't go over there, okay..?"

   "Okay," Renèe lied, getting up. "I'll be back with some ice cream. Love you, Pips." She leaned over and kissed Pippa's forehead before grabbing her stuff and walking out.

   It's been 2 days since Pippa found out about Lin and Jasmine, and 2 since she's been staying with Renèe. Oh, and 2 days until Christmas. The streets were crowded and everyone was in a jolly spirit. Except Lin, Renèe, Pippa, Jasmine, and Anthony, of course.

   Renèe hadn't had a chance to talk to- or yell at Lin yet, but today was the day. The day she had been longing for since 2 days ago. Renèe had told Pippa that she was going to 'talk' to Lin about the whole situation, but since Pippa knew Renèe almost better than she knew herself, she quickly caught on to her plan. She tried stopping Renèe from going over there, but she kept on insisting.

   Finally, Pippa gave up, and even though she made it seem as if she was convinced that Renèe wasn't going to go over to Lin, she knew better.

   Renèe got into her car and drove over to Pippa and Lin's home- at least it used to be. She didn't know what to call it anymore. Pippa hadn't stepped foot inside since she left, but all her things were still there. Lin was still there, as well--- at least Renèe hoped that he was.

   Once she was there, she knocked on the door loudly, her foot tapping on the ground impatiently. After 2 seconds of waiting out in the snow, the door opened to reveal a teary Lin, whose hair was a mess. "Renèe...?"

   "Lin. Manuel. Miranda." (That's when Lin knew... he f^cked up.) She pushed past him and into the house, her arms now crossed. "What the HELL were you thinking?" she asked, trying her hardest not to raise her voice, but she wasn't quite succeeding.

   Lin ran his hand through his hair and closed the door, sniffling. "Look, Renèe, I-" He stopped mid-sentence, unsure of what he was going to say next. "I was drunk... I couldn't s-stop myself..." He lowered his gaze, ashamed.

   "Oh, so just because you're drunk it means that you get to cheat on Pippa?" The sarcasm in her voice was going through the roof. When Lin raised his head to look at Renèe in the eye, he was instantly terrified. If glares could kill, Lin would have been dead long ago. "God, she trusted you!" she hissed, stepping closer to him.

   Lin rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, not knowing where to look. "I-I know," he whispered. There was no explanation for what he did. He didn't deserve pity. What he had done was wrong and disgusting, and he knew that. Lin wished with all his heart that he could take that night back, or that he could have instantly changed his mind about going, or not have one too many drinks that night.

   "And you didn't even want to tell her!" Renèe scoffed, rolling her eyes.

   "I thought that she might not need to know-"

   Her eyes widened when she heard the words coming from his mouth. "Not need to know?" she echoed. "Not need to know?! Excuse me, Mr. Miranda, I do not care if you're my boss and everything-" she paused to place a threatening finger on his chest before continuing. "-but there's something you should know! The truth always comes out. No matter how hard you try to cover it up! Maybe Pippa wouldn't have been as hurt as she is right now if you would have told her."

   Lin stayed silent, just taking everything in. He knew that she was right, so he wasn't going to try to prove her wrong. "I miss her so much," he whispered, on the verge of tears again. "I wish I could have just said no.."

   "You could have," Renèe said coldly, walking around him and towards the door. "But you didn't."

   He nodded stiffly, his back turned towards her as he stared at the ground.

   "Oh, and one more thing... Congratulations." Renèe walked out and slammed the door. Lin broke down at that instant, his attempts to keep himself calm and collected failing. He most definitely missed Pippa, and the thought about seeing her again this afternoon sent chills down his spine. Lin wasn't sure how they both were going to react, but he was trying to keep his head above water and think positively.

   He slumped down on the couch and cried his heart out at that moment, wanting nothing more than to just patch the giant hole that was now in his heart.

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Thank you for reading.
- Danielle