Smile For Me (Student/Teacher)

Meaningless

I couldn't concentrate in the library. What Mr. Grant said haunted me throughout the entire day, and it wasn't all what he said. But more how he had said it. With such... casualty.

I didn't even know if I was afraid or nervous about going to tutoring later that same day. Afraid of his mood swings and sudden shower of tension... Or nervous because I honestly did not know what to expect. I was both, and it was stressing me out.

"You've been standing there looking at those books for a while now." The librarian, Mrs. Kennedy, told me with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm just... I don't... Never mind. I'm sorry." I blabbed and grabbed my stuff hearing her teasing laugh as I exited the room. She loved me just as much as the other teachers, and I got along with her as well.

Eventually my discussion with him slipped my mind and I was left with the ablility to pay attention to my classes. I felt my old self coming back. I was able to think as I was before and not babble with sassy words.

I didn't think about Mr. Grant until I made eyecontact with him in the hallway when I went to my locker, which was right across from his room. My luck. He looked normal. Not normal for him, but just normal in general. He didn't look mad, he didn't look happy but no surprise there. Instead he just looked split between the emotion of bored and careless. The eye contact with him made me uncomfortable because I wasn't used to him... so not angry looking.

I grabbed my things quickly and rushed to my english class because I didn't want to linger around him any longer.

"You've been more quiet lately, is everything okay?" A classroom friend of mine asked. She was quiet too, so I just laughed at her.

"Yes, I'm fine." I assured her. She was the type of random person I'd go to with a dangerous secret, knowing she'd never let it slip. Not that I've ever told her a secret like that before. I had no secret to tell. Other than being sad and lonely. And missing my father more than anything, but I guessed my english teacher knew about that. Sort of, not too much about how much it affected me, but that was a good thing.

"Remember you can talk to me if you want." She promised.

I gave her a smile in appreciation and nodded. "I know, thanks."

But I didn't tell her how suddenly nervous I was to go to my calculus class. I didn't tell her how the man who taught the subject had been making me miserable throughout the entire year. I never said to her how stressful he'd been making it to learn just because he hated me. I never told her he hated me. Or why. Because I didn't know why.

I was on my way to the class and walked slow, pretending the do things on my phone. I ended up at his class right before the class began and the bell rang. He looked a bit annoyed, but he looked... Okay. His faced eased up the slightest from his usual expression and it took a turn in the entire class, the way the tension eased up as well.

"Let's get started." He began, and I watched the girls in the room fawn over him as they had been doing more often than they should. Not that they should at all, but I internally shrugged to myself and leaned over my desk lazily, propping myself on my elbow and allowing myself to admire him along with everyone else.

Who knows how many times he caught me, he was teaching and when I raised my hand he answered me. But it was a weird kind of answer because I didn't know what he said, so I didn't exactly know what I was asking and neither did he.

He looked from the board to me and began to say something and stopped himself. "Wait, what?" He asked in confusion, and I knew I wasn't the only one to find it... Adorable, because the class laughed quietly.