The Official Douche Bag Travel Guide of Chad Barrington

Travel Tip #1: Make a plan

     It has been two and half weeks since Chad had told off her honour and while she was still fuming about it, she did accept his apology. Yet it had come with several conditions, a few that Chad had not expected. His firm was told, more like ordered, to force Chad to take a two month vacation. Another condition that would save him from a hearing with the bar association was two months of mandatory meetings with a shrink. Considering how destructive his behaviour had been as of late, he didn't fight that either. The judge even insisted on appointing the shrink herself, vouching for a doctor that she most likely used herself. Chad never considered the judge to be crazy, but he could understand how stressing her job must be especially since she had to deal with douche bags like him every damn day. So it was no surprise that Chad would be forced to agree to therapy of some kind to deal with his anger issues, but what was surprising was that his firm supported it so much they offered to cover the tab. Chad thought that was very clever, because it gave the firm a shield against future litigation. Now they could claim the firm made great efforts to make sure Chad didn't behave like that again. It would save them a lot more money than it would cost to give Chad some professional help. While Chad wasn't too keen on the idea, he went with it none the less as he was quite confident that he was getting off light for what he had done. He should and was thankful not getting into any trouble with the bar association.

     The firm had not suspended Chad, but as instructed put him on a two month paid vacation. The partners wanted to make it unpaid but the man who was punched in the stomach, the councilman, insisted on it or he and his many influential contacts would take their business to another firm. So after making a heartfelt apology to her honour, Chad was sent home and ordered not to come back to the office for at least two months. If he needed anything from the office, his secretary Janet would get it for him. Under their agreement, Janet would be allowed to keep working at Chad's office to take messages and keep things organized in his absence. Chad didn't need anything from the office, and spent the first few weeks at home playing World of Warcraft and watching Maury Pouvich, eager to find out which sucker was the baby's father. Yet this day was different, as he had to leave the apartment and travel downtown for the second session of his court mandated therapy. He was about four minutes early and had to wait ten before being welcomed in by his therapist. Chad hung his jacket up and strolled over to the same chair he had sat in the time before. The therapist, Doctor Connors, stood there and noted the difference his client had made since the last and first time the two of them had met.

     Chad looked up at the therapist as he stared. "What?"

     "You look a little different this time," the doctor noted, "Last week you were so professional. You were wearing a suit that looked more expensive than my car, you were clean shaven and your hair was slicked back. Today you're letting loose a bit. You're wearing sneakers, blue jeans and have a bit of stubble this time. You're wearing a dress shirt, but there's no tie and the sleeves are rolled up a bit. So you care about your appearance but seemed to be more comfortable with me this time out."

     "I'm just tired of trying so much," Chad said, "You didn't seem to notice or care what I was wearing, so it didn't seem worth making the effort for."

     "I noticed, Mr. Barrington," Connors said as he finally sat down in his usual chair, which Chad liked to call the throne of judgement.

     "I just got lazy," Chad corrected, "the suits are still in the closet but I don't feel the need nor any pressing reason to wear them."

     "Well, you actually look more comfortable," Connors observed, "I hope this is a sign that you might be more comfortable talking to me today."

     "I guess we'll have to wait and see." Chad replied.

     "I'm not judging, Mr. Barrington." Connors told him, "Just making an observation, this feels to me like you're coming out of your shell rather than becoming lazy. Do you think a Knight wears his armor all the time? He doesn't. The Knight only suits up when battle is imminent, and that's what came to mind when I saw you today. Your amour is your suit, your sharp look. The courtroom is your battle field, so it only makes sense that you only wear it when you go to work."