Chapter Thirty-Five: Popcorn and M&Ms

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The next hour was the most difficult time of my life. It took all my strength to remain seated during that interview. I felt sick to my stomach as I lied on live television about how amazing Mr. Mason is. When they asked me what I thought about his campaign, I just smiled and said, "Mr. Mason is the most generous and charitable man I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I don't think there is anyone better for the job."

I felt so fake, but I still smiled as if nothing was wrong and gushed about how generous of a man he was for taking me in. As I lied, all I could think about was that he was using me. The man sitting next to me is using me and cheating on his wife. The man sitting next to me will be the next Governor of California, and he will get away with it. The man sitting next to me is a liar.

Somehow, I made it through the interview without messing anything up, but after it was finished, I was gone. I had no desire to linger. I didn't accept Mr. Mason's congratulations. Instead, I turned on my heel and left without saying goodbye.

I had to leave. That was the only thing I could think about once I made it to my room. I had to leave this place. Not Curmouth, but the Mason's Mansion. I felt trapped in the pristine corridors, and every inch of me was dying to get out. I couldn't stay in this cold mansion for much longer.

I quickly changed out of the black dress I was wearing, and put on shorts and a tee. Then I grabbed my phone and rushed out the door. When I made it to the car garage, I got into a Jeep instead of my usual Mercedes. Then I pressed down on the gas, leaving the Mason's Mansion far behind.

As I drove, I wasn't sure where I was going. I just went without cause. I think everyone needs to do that sometime: go without a destination. I turned up the radio, blasting the volume as I plowed down the unfamiliar roads. It helped me avoid thinking about my situation and focus on how loud everything was. I continued to drive until the sun began to set, marking the Saturday skies with strokes of pastel tones.

When I slammed on the breaks, I found myself in a familiar place. The Nature Center where Jack and I had our date laid out before me, the green trees crowding the entrance. It was the same place, but I felt like a different person.

I parked the Jeep and got out, walking along the trail. I trekked along the dirt paths quickly until I recognized the thin strip of trampled grass that marked the hidden trail to the meadow. Then I followed the path until I reached the meadow.

It still looked as beautiful as it had when Jack and I were there last week. The meadow was green and lush, dotted with bright flowers. The view of the ocean still took my breath away as I looked out upon it, watching the waves white cap. As I surveyed my surroundings, I could almost see Jack standing by my side like he did just one week ago.

But now, Jack was gone. Maybe not forever, but he was absent from my life. This past week, he had forgotten about me and focused only on Tabitha. He became too busy for me, and it broke my heart. I knew that he meant well. He was only trying to protect Tabitha. But still, I needed him. I needed him so badly.

Between everything happening with Will, Mr. Mason, and the letter from the Foster Center, I really needed an anchor. Jack used to be my anchor, but now, he didn't seem to notice me anymore.

I walked to the middle of the field, then I collapsed. My eyes met the sky, and everything melted into one, huge mess. I wasn't sad. I wasn't angry. I was done.

Lately things felt so unbearable and messy. I should leave.

I should leave Curmouth and never look back. I closed my eyes, trying to picture living in Phoenix. It must be so sunny and hot. There would be sandy deserts and wide horizons. I pictured Jasmine Greenwald, who must have looked something like my mother with brown hair, fair skin, and emerald eyes. My mother...

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