A Condemned Lust [Lionel Messi]

Chapter eighteen

"Stop! Please." She mumbled, tossing and turning in her bed. "No.. Don't go.." she cried out.

"Hey, hey, baby, wake up." He whispered, caressing her face. "I'm here, it's just a nightmare."
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"You haven't touched your breakfast yet. What's wrong?" He said before taking a bite out of his croissant.

"Nothing, i'm not hungry."

"This was your excuse for the past months Laura. Why are you doing this to yourself?" He questioned worryingly.

She didn't respond. Just like every other time. It became her signature. Day after day she slipped more into this silence, embracing the emptiness inside of her. And when she did speak, her sentences were like icebergs, with just the tip of her thought coming out of her mouth, and the rest kept up in her head.

"It's been three months that we're in Paris. Yet you're still having the nightmares, you're not eating well, and you're so distant. In fact i feel that the more we spend time together, the more you slip away."

"Give me a break Marc." She shot, standing up and going back to her room.

She was indeed slipping away. How did she think that she can possibly forget? The fancy French cuisine, the luxury stores, the magical spots in Paris, she thought it should be enough. Hell, she even decided to give it a shot with the person who knew her the most; her best friend. So why is she still in square zero? Why did her new journey end before even starting? How could visiting her dream country mean absolutely nothing to her? Just random places with faceless strangers.
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"I'm going for a walk." She said, letting him kiss her briefly before heading outside. She flinched just like every other time he touched her. Every kiss was tasteless, senseless. She believed she was truly becoming numb. A cold soul that became indifferent to any other man's touch. And it wasn't because of him. Marc was perfect for her. Almost too perfect. He loved her since they were kids, and she always knew. But he was never more than a best friend. She never saw him in a different way. He always cared deeply for her well being, he always put her happiness before his, and this was no exception. He promised her that he'll help her get over him, because for him, she and Leo never belonged together. "You are worlds apart," she recalls him saying to her repeatedly. Worlds apart.. but what if she was ready to merge her world into his again?

She roamed the beautiful streets of the French capital, watching the tourists come and go, taking pictures, laughing, enjoying the city, while she felt like a ghost, a nobody, not even herself.

It was crazy how she didn't only lose him, but herself in the process too. How could she have known that existing without him would become intolerable? How did she manage to exist for two decades without him, thinking that she had reached her full growth, with all the parts she needs to keep going, just to discover that she only existed when she was with him?

Arriving in front of the Eiffel tower, she sat in the garden, hoping for a refresher. Maybe the cool air, the nice sight, the people's laughs will reflect on her. Seeing other persons enjoying their lives could help, right? It should distract her somehow, no?

She took a long breath, tilting her head backwards looking at the sky, the blue sky bathed in the fiery yellow of the sun.

She closed her eyes for a moment, when suddenly, for the first time in three months, all her senses were alarmed.

She shot her eyes open, looking at the blonde man who was now sitting next to her. It wasn't him, no. But it was his perfume. The same scent she always used to get lost in, sniffing it like a drug. It felt like her lungs breathed oxygen for the first time in a long while, with her once tired and almost dead heart, beating like a wild animal again.