Chapter Nineteen

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I step out from the shower, wrapping a towel around my body slowly. I'm finding it difficult to leave this safe room where I can hide from anything that reminds me of Matteo.

When I got back from the café, I knew he was in his music room. I could hear him on the piano. It seems like he's a world away from me. I don't like yelling at him. I don't like hurting him, either. I never have, ever since I met him. But I married him, without question. I took on parenting his aunt's child. I left my job. What has he given up?

Nothing.

He's been able to stay out as late as he wants. Go to parties with his company, something that doesn't even sound like something he'd want to do. He flirts with young theatre techs. Where is the man I married? Where is the man that grabbed my hand on that taxi? The man that inscribed the necklace resting on my neck?

He's not here anymore. I don't know who this man is.

I step out into the room, brush in hand.

"Well, we're going to have to do something about your eyes."

I look up, jumping when I find Veronica sitting on the edge of my bed.

"What the hell? What are—"

"I'm going to help you get ready while Matteo does a puzzle outside with Charley."

Matteo's phone call this morning suddenly rings a bell. Surely that's not still happening? "I'm not getting ready for anything. I'm not going out with him."

"Emma."

"No," I snap, shaking my head. "No."

After a moment, she rests her hands on my arms. "Look at me."

"No."

"You're sounding like Charles. Sit down."

I chuckle, tearfully and open my eyes. "You're killing me."

"Give me that brush."

I hand it to her and go where she takes me. I sit down on the edge of the bed and she climbs behind me. "Have you spoken to mom yet?"

"No."

She combs gently through my hair. "You should do it."

"She said that he had ruined me."

"Neither of you meant what you said. She feels terrible, I know it. I spoke to her."

"I don't know what I'm doing," I whisper through the lump in my throat. "I think I'm going through a panic attack or something. I actually went to see Danny today. I called him."

"You've taken on a lot in the past couple months, all on your own. Matteo will own up to that."

"I don't want him to."

"Yes, you do. You want him, you love him."

"I don't—"

"You are soulmates. Emma, think back to everything you two have been through. How he was when you met him, what he did when you left or what you were like when he was gone. I mean..."

"He doesn't want Charles."

"I don't think he's let Charles in yet. You told me he had a bad relationship with his aunt? Could it be possible that Charles reminds him of her?"

I press my fingers to my swollen eyes. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because I love you. And I know what you both can be when you work together. This was a huge leap for you, too large of a leap, but I think he's realized what he's done wrong. He called me in hysterics this morning and after seeing you with Danny, he knows he's losing you."

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