Can't Help Myself

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2 years later

Kieron is 19, close to 20

Kieron is 19, close to 20

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Anahi recently turned 2

Anahi recently turned 2

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"C'mon baby." She held her arms up, and I picked her up with a grunt. "You getting so big on me."

"I two now Daddy." My heart fluttered like it did every time I heard her voice. She was so smart and her voice was so beautiful and joyous to my soul.

I bounced Anahi in my arms. "Yes you are, now let's get you ready to go. We're gonna see mommy today." She clapped and exclaimed yayyy, making me say it with her. With a kiss to her cheek and a giggle in return, I began to dress her so we could leave. And like any other time I've dressed her, she gave me no hassle. And when it came time for me to get dressed, she sat and waited like the big girl she claimed and portrayed to be. We both ate cereal and then were out for the day.
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"Almost there." I told her, holding onto her tiny fingers as we walked. She gasped.

"There she is, daddy. There's mommy." My heart began to beat immensely fast, I had to calm myself. We walked a bit further before finally reaching our destination. We took a seat on the ground.

My eyes immediately filled with tears, I bit my lip. "Hey baby." Bringing my hand forward, I dragged my fingertips down the headstone. The whole time I stared directly at the picture of the love of my life smiling like the happiest person alive– I'd taken that picture of her.

"Hi mommy!" I smiled sadly while Anahi was so happy, waving at the stone as if it were her actual mother. She was the only reason why I haven't broken down yet. I remember my last moments with Honour, and how I so badly wanted to lose every ounce of my being and rampage.

I sat next to Honour, gripping her hand tightly. She'd just gotten out of surgery, and was stable. Right now it was a 50/50 chance of survival and I was screaming to God for her to make a full recovery– She had to. We'd just had a baby together almost a month ago. I'd been here all night, and right now I was running on coffee. Her parents were in the waiting room asleep and T agreed to stay with them, giving me alone time with baby.

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