My Life: The Painstakingly Documented Account of Camila Anderson's Descent into Madness

Part 1: There are 5 things severely wrong with my life.

Just sitting in my room. 

Bored to tears. 

Thinking about how sad my life is. 

1) My mother is from the Stone-Age. 

2) She hates me having a life 'cause hers is practically over and mine's just starting.  

3) My little brother's bonkers. He thinks i'm a cat. 

4) Most people think I'm emo. Newsflash, I'm not! 

5) I will never ever get a boyfriend. 

and then BAM! 

"CAMMMMMMMMIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" Eric yelled as he barged into my room. 

"Eric, leave Camila alone, shes study... Well, shes supposed to be studying." My mother said. 

If she thinks i actually come to my room to study, shes mad. Well she is generally bonkers as is my little brother Eric. He got kicked out of preschool. How the hell is that possible? Apperently, you can do that by running around in nothing but your knickers yelling, "THE END IS NEAR! IT'S COMING!" 

He's insane. 

Nuff said. 

"Camila? Are you even listening to me?"  

"Mother, why would you even ask such a question? Of course, you have my undivided attention." I said sweetly. 

"Why are you listening to this crap?" 

How could she ever call this music crap! It's Tom Petty! WTF? 

"MOTHER!!!!! This music is not crap!" 

"Yes I know hunny, but this record player is! Why don't you buy another one?" 

"Cause, i don't want to..." 

What is her issue? She never had a problem with it when dad used it. They would dance to recods on it. Me and Eric would spy on them all the time, say they looked like loons. But i would do anything to see her smile like that again. 

Eric cam up and jumped on my bed. How charming? 

Then he whispered in my ear, "It's ok Catty, you my cat and i lobe you." 

With that, he gave me a slobbery kiss on the cheek. 

Ew. 

"Get off me." I said and pushed him off my bed. 

"CAMILA!" 

"Yes?" 

"He just said he loved you and you repay him by pushing him off your bed?" 

"I believe the correct term is 'lobe'" 

"QUIT BEING SO BLOODY CHEEKY! YOUR NOT EVEN THAT FUNNY AND I SWEAR TO GOD..." 

Oh, drone on! Like i'm listening. ERic crawled out of my bed like a cat and with every step, he mooed. Like a cow. 

"Ducky, you are aware that cats meow, not moo, right?" 

"Silly Catty! Of course I know you bloody cheeky cat!" 

Yey. Now my mother and my little brother think i'm bloody cheeky. He shouldn't even be saying that carp. 

You know what? 

I neeed to get out. Like NOW. 

I'm gonna call Simon.