The First Man I Loved

Chapter 13

~Jonathan~

"E-Evan?"

He was locked in the bathroom once again. All I could hear was his sobbing. 

"Evan? Can I come in please?"

 He was silent for a bit then, I heard a click and the door opened. He stood there, his arms down, his pajamas soaking wet. His head was down. I walked over to him and stood right in front of him. He slowly looked up and his eyes were already bloodshot. His tears were leaving marks down his face. Once he looked up the whole way, his chocolate eyes meeting mine, he instantly wrapped his arms around me. 

"This whole time... I forgot he was gone..." He said, his voice sounding totally different. 

"That's because he was here." I pushed him away easily and pointed at his heart. He looked down and back up at me. 

"Because of you. I forgot because of you. You showed me there was always a bright side to shitty situations." He sniffed and I wiped his dried tears away. We pulled close again and just stayed in that embrace. The embrace we both cherished. 

"His casket is a light blue. He always loved the sky. He said it reminded him of Mom, and every time she smiled, her teeth were as white as the clouds." Evan explained and started crying again. I put my hand on his head and started running my fingers through his hair and pulled him even closer. 

"I love you." He mumbled and rubbed his head into my chest. I slightly smiled and continued stroking his soft hair. 

"I love you too." I murmured, looking out the bathroom window and into the deep woods behind the house. 

***

"Are you ready?" Evan asked me as I fixed the black dress shirt I was wearing. I sighed and met my brown eyes in the mirror. Behind me I watched Evan peek by my shoulder. 

"What's wrong?" He asked, his eyes obviously purple from how much he was crying last night. All of this made me shatter inside. The way he was basically screaming last night in my arms, and how warm his tears were on my arm. He went through 10 boxes of tissues. He went through layers of my body and tore open my heart. But why was I worrying about myself when he's the one who's lost a close one. His father, the one who got him through life, even if he had a different dream than his father did. They still loved each other, and I have a feeling he would have also loved having a son-in-law instead of a daughter-in-law but, I'm getting ahead of myself. 

"Nothing. I'm just... I love you." I finally said and turned to look at him. He blinked a few times but, he eventually replied, "I love you too, and always will." I leaned in and kissed him on the forehead as he started crying again. 

"No, Evan. Shh." I let him cry into my shoulder. 

"It's all going to be okay..." 

~Evan~

"Heh, I wasn't really ready for this, I mean... he was pretty young." I started and instantly wanted to crawl over to Delirious and stay wrapped in his arms crying.  I met his gaze in the crowd of family members and friends. I spotted my mom and it struck a feeling, the way she smiled at me but, her eyes were as dark as the night sky. She wanted me to keep going. 

"He was a great father, the best anyone could have and I was lucky enough to be the son to have him." I looked right at my mother when I said that, and I could see the tears forming in her dark brown eyes. 

"H-he'd always listen to everything I'd tell him, and he would always be the shoulder that I'd cry on. He was there doing his job and being a father." I looked into the crowd one last time and found Delirious's gaze. 

"I told my dad nearly everything but, he disappeared too soon for me to tell him about who picked me back up on my feet. Dad was always so uneasy about the internet gaming friend thing but, without that I would've been the most lost, depressed, alcoholic in the world. But, one of them sacrificed their personal life to save me. In our terms it's "face reveal"." I quoted with the words and everyone chuckled, "But, he came all the way from North Carolina just to save my butt before I did anything stupid. My dad died, what was I supposed to do? I was a kid missing his other parent, I was freaking out." I met Delirious's gaze once again and didn't leave it until I was done talking. 

"His internet name is H2O Delirious, weird right? But I love it. His real name is Jonathan and well... he saved me from my own distress. He fed me, he showed me how to sleep and be happy again. He showed me that there's always a bright side after the shit storm. During all of this happiness and well... heh love, I forgot about Dad for a while and I fell head over heels for this bastard, and I never got to tell Dad about my amazing boyfriend." I smiled and both me and my other half were crying. He was squeezing my mother's hand as they both cried. I put the microphone back on it's stand and looked at my father one last time. I put my hand on his arm and looked at his closed eyes. 

"So yeah... Dad I am gay but, I'm in love. I know I said that with every woman I dated but, this is real and I can feel it. And I know he feels it too..." I turned around to see everyone standing and forming a line to look at Ian Fong. 

~Jonathan~ 

I walked up with Evan's mom, Emerald. She held my hand tight and we both met up with Evan, right in front of his father. He steps back and his mom steps forward. 

"Oh Ian..." We both hear her say and we look at each other. Evan's eyes start to get watery. 

"It's always great to have a funeral right before New Years Eve, right?" He asked, his voice already cracking. I instantly grab him, "Of course, he'll have a new life in the New Year. So will your mom, and you." 

"I hope that New Year is with you." 

"Trust me, it will." 

"Delirious..." 

"Yes Evan." 

"Will you stay until Easter?" He removed his head from my chest to look at me. I slowly smiled and kissed him on the forehead. 

"Oh Vanoss, I'll do so much better than that."