Fates | Book 2 ✔️

[16]

"You did not hear a word," he says as he bumps pass me. I grab his forearm and spin him back around. 

"I--"

"Even if you did hear, it doesn't mean anything. You mean nothing to me, Seth, nothing. What my heart is telling me is quite different from what my head is saying. Which do you think I will listen to, this time, huh? Answer me that."

 He yanks his arm from away from me and walks off in an entirely different direction. 

All I can do is look at my hand and furrow my brows. Every word he says seems to hurt my heart more and more each time. How much more of this will I have to go through to get him to understand my feelings for him are genuine? Maybe they weren't in the very beginning, but towards the middle, I had truly fallen for him. I sigh and straighten my back. But I'll do as Yorin said. I'll stick this all out. Let him say what he wants to say now. He is angry but more afraid than anything. I take a deep breath and watch his back growing smaller and smaller as he goes further into the village. At times, he makes it so fucking hard to love him, but I do and I always will, it seems. 

"Damn," I hear Kaj's voice say coming from behind me. He whistles and shakes his head causing me to push him and start walking toward the pack house. 

"You're not going to go after him?"

"What's the point in doing that when he will do nothing but say terrible things to me? He's angry and he's upset. He only goes on and does that when he has nothing left to defend himself with." 

"So... " Kaj trails off, "I take this as a sign that you're giving up?" 

"No, I'm just giving him his space."

"You've been saying that for months now and you're practically still in the same place you started at," Kaj laughs. "Space is not what he needs or wants, you know..." 

"Look, Kaj, another lifetime ago I would have taken you up on that offer, but I'm really not interested. I don't think I ever will be... and don't I count as having baggage?"

Kaj smiles before his gray eyes leave mine. 

"Lance was never my type for reasons like this one. He's too... set in his ways and stubborn. And there is a lot of hurt there I couldn't possibly manage to fix. I wasn't just speaking of his kid when I said that, you know. On top of being an Alpha, he is just too much." 

I smile at this, happy to know someone else realizes it besides me. That and the fact that I really am the only one chasing after him.

"He is much for anyone who isn't his mate, I suppose." 

Kaj stops walking and looks at me again. This time he wasn't smiling. 

"Then go speak with him. He will be leaving soon. You should go with him." 

"He just got back." 

"As I said before... he has other issues," Kaj mumbles. 

I bite down on my lower lip and look over out in the forest where I know he has gone. As much as I try to act like his words don't hurt me, they do. But I can't let a golden opportunity like this slip past me. We'll finally be alone with another and he has no choice but to listen to me then. Hopefully, those walls he has been so carefully strengthening and crafting for all these years will come tumbling down once and for all.

"Then Emery--"

"I'll handle that. Go now. Hurry up before he gets too far," Kaj says pushing me towards the village.

I give him one last look before I take off through the village. People's faces pass me in a blur of lines. By the time I reach the forest, clouds of my breath can be seen and the sun already is beginning to set. I look around, steadying myself, and try to locate Lance's scent.