In the End, I am only Words

Enclosure

Day by day

Hour by hour

Minute by minute

Piece by piece

Breaks away

I don't care

Or I care too much

The in between has left

I thought it was done

She was no longer (my) Polaris

But it seems I am still centered around her

It seems that even when I see reality

The illusion that I am living it covers my eyes

Like a being from within

That never stopped believing in chances

Maybe that is not it

Though it still looks like I am reversing my own progress in that matter

When emotions bubble to the surface

Some get through

While some are trapped under a film of confusion

How do I express this?
How do I express this correctly?
How do I express this without something else coming out as well?

Pride
Vanity
Judgement

I struggle to keep those in check

Even though I'm not sure if they're actually a problem

Or if I'm terrified they'll become one

Keeping this under control

Keeping my mind under control

Is not working well

There is an angry bull in my head

Crashing through walls

Destroying its surroundings

Trampling whatever tries to interfere

I shifted back

Closed myself in

Worrying more about the adventures of fictional characters

In books and tv episodes

Than about what state I'm actually in

Few things strike me as more than superficial

Few things are more than what can be summed up in a sentence

Too many, too much

Not enough, not enough

Too many trapped expressions

Too much is disregarded and sent to the corner

Not enough will

Not enough strength

•••

Just wanted to quickly say thank you guys so much for reading! Stay beautiful!

-Eris