Against All Odds

Chapter 7

"Hey, Madison. Um, I heard about Josh." I could hear Bree retort, her voice subtle, as if she's whispering, as if she's walking on eggshells.

"I'm sorry too." I respond silently, under my breathe.

I've been staring at the window for who knows how long. The sun beats down on the green healthy grass, causing it to glisten from the residual rain. Yeah, it was raining just a while ago. I took the rain as a sign that nature feels the same way as I do.

Yesterday was such a horrendous day. The most horrific day by far in my 18 years of living on Earth. After finding out that my ex-has gotten over me as fast as a blink of an eye and that he's currently dating Nicky -of all people!-. I just feel so hollow, lost, disbelief, confused, depressed. All I remember doing yesterday after I got back to my room is that I cried. A lot. 

And now, at this very moment, I couldn't even cry even if I want to. If I was able to, I'd probably cry out blood and wouldn't that be a sight?

I can't believe that he just got over just like that. I mean, doesn't he love me? Was all those things he said to me were lies all along? Was I just a fling to him? A 3 year fling? Was his promises all lies, as well? Didn't he take me seriously?

I took him seriously, alright. I believed him when he said that I was the most beautiful girl he ever saw. I believed him when he said he would love me and never hurt me. I believed him when he convinced me that I was worthy. I loved him with all of my heart.

So, all this time I never was beautiful?

 He never actually loved me?

He knew this was coming? 

All this time, I am not worthy of anyone?

...I'm not worthy to be happy?

OH MY GOSH. WHY?!

Why was I so naive? Why did I invest the whole of my heart? Why did I even trust him to begin with?

Now, I'm all in pieces. Heartbroken. Fragmented. Hollow. Empty. 

I close my eyes and  let out a long defeated sigh.

"Madison, you've been static at the same bloody spot for half a day now. Aren't you hungry? Aren't you thirsty?" Zack piped up, his voice laced with genuine concern.

I shook my head, tearing my gaze away from the spot that I've been staring at for-according to Zack- half a day.

Eating or drinking is the least of my concern. I just don't want to do anything.

"Madison, please. It really is not fair that you're the victim in this whole situation. He's all happy with Nicky, while you're here being like.... this." she states, her voice hinting a pinch of irritation.

"Yeah, what Bree-"

I wave my hand to stop him from continuing. I got back up to me feet slowly and turn to them. They're faces are just filled with concern and sympathy. Anything but I want.

"Thanks, you guys, for caring, but really, just leave me alone." I croak, quite surprised to find my voice flaky and gritty. 

"Madison, it hurts me to see you like-"

"YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A SINGLE CLUE OF HOW I FEEL!" I exclaim, cutting Zack short.

"I'm not only hurt, but I'm angry, frustrated, depressed, unhappy, sad and so much more. But one thing I do know is that I am anything but happy." I add, on a softer tone.