Second Chances

Chapter 18

Chapter 18

The rest of the weekend was amazing. I had breakfast in bed, we watched movies, it was just amazing. That is why I'm so sad that he has to return to work today.

"You start work too early." I moaned as I pulled the duvet up around me further to block out the cold.

"You're telling me." Nathan grunted as he pulled on his socks. "But, it brings in the money I need to keep a roof over our head and food in our bellies." He gave me a sweet smile. He kissed my forehead gently. "And that is why it's worth all the hard work." 

"You're too sweet." I smiled up at him. 

"Only to my angel." He stood up straight. "Right, off to work I go! I'll see you later, I love you." With that he left the bedroom and I listened as he left the flat. I settlled back down in the warm bad, half five really is ridiculously early, I shut my eyes and it didn't take long before sleep engulfed me again.

I was awoken sharply by a furious knocking on the door. I turned over and shut my eyes still feeling exhausted and hoping that whoever it was would get the message and go away. I don't even, technically, live here so it could only be somebody looking for Nathan. If it was one of the 'gang' they would have text or called first. However, this person was seriously impatient and clearly has no idea when to stop because five minutes later they were still knocking. I give up! I swung my legs off the bed and stood up. Without even considering to put on any trousers, the old dress shirt of Nathan's covered nearly everything, and I am far too annoyed by the knocking to be bothered. I ran down the flat stairs and unlocked the door quickly and swung it open so quickly that I recieved a swift punch to the nose.

"FUCK!" I screemed as my hands went up to my nose to catch the already falling blood. 

"SHIT, Maddi! I'm so sorry!" The panicked deep voice sent shivers down my spine. I looked at the person wrapped up in a scarf coming over their mouth and a hat on. In disguise. 

"Leave me alone." I told Ethan sternly. But the opening of my mouth meant that the taste of blood quickly flooded my scenses. 

"Let me in, quickly before someone notices who I am! I doubt you want pictures of me coming to see you at the flat you live in with your boyfriend plastered everywhere for your boyfriend to see." He spat the word boyfriend as if it was poison in his mouth. He had a good point and as much as I didn't want to I stepped aside and he strolled in and up the stairs quicker than I could say 'come in'. I shut the door with the side of my body and sighed before following in the direction Ethan had. 

Once I made it to the top of the stairs he was already meeting me in the hallway with a wet flannel. 

"Here." He moved away my blood filled hands and placed the flannel in their place. I knocked his hands away quickly and put mine on the cold flannel. I couldn't stand the feelings that were pushing their way to the surface by just his mere precense. He sighed deeply before shaking his head and entering the living room. I made my way to the bathroom to try and stop the bleeding, clean myself up, and calm myself down. Ethan was just in the other room of Nathan's flat. Why do things have to be so complicated?

"Is your nose OK?" Ethan asked as I walked into the living room. He had ditched the 'disguise' and was in a pair of denim jeans and a white t-shirt. Why did he have to look so good? He was sitting as if he owned the place on the sofa. I feebly nodded then shakily sat down in the armchair. "How can you just disappear like that?" He put his head in his hands his cocky arrogance leaving him, now he became fragile right in front of my eyes. Tugging on my heart strings. Whilst we sat in my boyfriends appartment. "Then, when I finally get ahold of you you have a boyfriend! I like you Maddi, we went on dates and I was ME around you. All because you didn't know who I was, well thats what I thought, turns out you're more decieving than you look." He became hard instantly as he glared at me. "Was the plan to hook me take my money then come back to this..." He looked around before putting up his hands. "Dump?" He looked disgusted. "With your boyfriend." He shook his head in disbelief. "You should become an actress. Look at you, fake crying, it's impressive." His voice was bitter. I hadn't even noticed the tears.

"I..." My voice cracked. I cleared my throat and wiped my eyes. Pull yourself together Maddi! Does it really matter what he thinks? Let him hate you. You have Nathan! Even as I told myslef that I know that it does matter what Ethan thinks of me because... "I like you too Ethan! You've got it all wrong you really have!" I stood up and made my way over to the sofa in a split decision. "He turned up out of nowhere almost like a blessing, Nathan knows me! Who I am! He was my knight in shining armour taking me away from somewhere I was unhappy and unwanted! So I came back here with him. Met all my old friends and forgot about the stupid amnesia and the life I'd built afresh. All I cared about was my old life. And Nathan. Because I really like him too. And he is my boyfriend. I never meant to hurt you and I honestly didn't know who you were until I took a trip into town and saw you everywhere. It was a shock. Then you got all mad... and now I'm in this mess where I really don't know what to think or feel anymore-" I was cut off by his lips on mine forcefully and firmly. I found myself reacting instantly remembering back to the kiss on the boat. I climbed onto his lap and he held my hips firmly.

"Tell me how this makes you feel Maddi." He pulled away only to say that. Oh God. This felt right, this felt good! I opened my eyes slightly and what I saw horrified me. In the mirror above the sofa I was kissing Ethan, my hand holding his hair tightly. Then on the wall opposite in the reflection I saw a framed photo of Nathan and I kissing. The only decoration in the room on the walls. It was one Nathan told me he'd taken on his phone one morning, before the accident. I pushed away from Ethan and wiped my mouth. What had I done?! What am I doing?! Ethan looked at me shocked.

"Get out. Get out of the flat now!" I demanded as I tried to sound strong and hold back the tears. "GET OUT!" I shouted as I walked out of them room quickly and into the bathroom locking it behind me so he couldn't follow me. I heard an angry yell before stomping and the slamming of the front door. I collapsed on the floor my feet going from beneath me. The sobs came fast and heavy. They were almost painful. I was furious with myself. Upset beyond belief. My chest was hurting as if it had been shot. Guilt overwhelmed me.

What had I done?

Why did I kiss Ethan?

On Nathan's sofa....

And liked it.