Signed by his daughter

TEARS AND SEX|CHAPTER 42

I wake up and all I can hear is rain. It's pouring with rain outside. It is absolutely bucketing down. I sure as hell didn't miss this weather. Brad's arms are so tightly wrapped around me I can't move. He's awake. He's the reason I'm awake. He's kissing my neck. Ugh the guilt is fucking me over. 

"How long have you been awake for? What time is it?" I mumbled and try and escape his grip. He doesn't let go and I can definitely feel a boner against my leg.

"Mmmm maybe about two hours? Not sure. It's about 3 in the afternoon though." He whispered against my neck. "You wanna...?" He trailed off. I knew what he meant. What he wanted to do. I wanted to too. But was it right? Probably not. I felt so bad but I love him, god I love him. And I want him right now, so I'll have him right now...

I let him roll on top of me and tried to enjoy what I want.

The shower water hisses and I'm lost. How long have I been in here for? I need to call Rae, she'll know what to do. I get out and wrap a towel around me, heading back into my bedroom. It's empty to my surprise. I get dressed quickly and head into the kitchen where I find a note from Brad.

It reads:

"Headed out to grab some stuff from the supermarket and get some other stuff, Rae's coming over".

I breathe a sigh of relief at the last part. I know she'll be over soon so I begin to prepare what I'm gonna tell her. What am I gonna tell her? There were no excuses.

I let her in and she sat down on the couch.

"What did you do?" She asked skeptically. She knows, she fucking knows.

"How do you know? How can you tell? Is it that obvious?" I begin to panic.

"To me it's obvious, which one was it?" 

"Luke" I feel so ashamed. What the hell. I have fucked up so phenomenally.

"Were you safe?"

"Yes but I'm worried, what if I'm pregnant? He put the idea into my head. Now I'm worried. It was a stupid mistake. I don't even know what happened." I'm in tears now. I can hardly breathe.

"Oh honey. You know there's only one way to be sure right now." Rae is always so kind, I don't deserve her.

"I know but I can't leave. Brad'll be home any second. And what do I do if I am? If this is Luke's holy shit, Brad can never know."

"Look you don't know that you're pregnant and we'll deal with Brad later. I'm gonna go right now and get you a test. I'll be back in a second" She grabs her keys and runs out the door before I can say anything to her. I lay down on the couch and my mind is cloudy. The tears won't stop running down my cheeks and I hear the front door open. I pray to god it's Rae. 

"Babyyyyy." He kneels down by the couch and wipes away my tears like the gentleman he is.

"I'm fine honey." I smile up at him and grab his hand.

"What's going on?"

"I'm just feeling overwhelmed, just really tired that's all." I try and reassure him and I think it works.

"Aw baby, do you wanna go back to mine?" He is so sweet to me. And I wanna say yes, I wanna lay in a messy room whilst we listen to Arctic Monkeys and lay in a bed that smells like him. I want it to all go away. I'm such a shitty human being. He loves me and I love him but I am so stupid.

"No she needa stay here I have something for her, scootch out the way this is girls stuff" Rae swoops in and grabs me off the couch, the plastic bag in her hand. She drags me into my bedroom before I can even say anything and into the bathroom. She locks the door behind us and pulls out the tests. She bought a few but I know I'll only need one. I rip open the box and squat on the toilet.