Of Wildflowers and Gunpowder

Chapter 13

The next day, Benjamin helped me stand up from the bed and told me to practice walking around the room while he was gone, doing whatever Washington expected of him. 
     It was a excruciating process, but after almost an hour of taking a few steps, collapsing in painful tears, and standing back up again, it seemed like I was doing better.
Gritting my teeth, I forced myself to pace the room with the smallest limp I could muster. It hurt but I couldn't help smiling. The sooner I can walk, the sooner I can get back to normal life.
Normal. I was an orphaned young woman working as a spy for some of the Crown's most hated men. I had just escaped from a death sentence in Brooklyn and ridden to West Point on horseback in a single day just to deliver some letters. I was sleeping in the same house as General George Washington. What part of normal life could I truly attest to?
Just then, a knock at the door jolted me from my thoughts. Looking down at myself, I realized I was still only wearing my linen chemise...I would be insane to let someone in wearing only this.
     I went to the small wardrobe but grunted in frustration when I realized it only had a few of Benjamin's traveling clothes in it.
"Who is it?" I said cheerfully, hiding my exasperation as I scrambled under the bed in search of a cloak or robe of some kind. "C'est moi," the voice echoed back, "Lafayette. Are you decent?"
I scoffed quietly to myself, finally pulling a small but ornate trunk from deep under the bed. It reeked of Peggy Shippen. "One moment, s'il vous plâit!" I cried, pulling out a few expensive stays and petticoats before laying my hands on an olive green robe that Peggy had probably only worn around the house.
Draping it over myself and hugging the soft fabric tightly, I ran to the door and opened it with a wry smile.
     He bowed and brought my hand to his lips, saying, "Mademoiselle, it is good to see you again. You look well."
"I am doing much better, merci. General Washington was kind to allow me to stay here for a few days. Are you recovering from your fall?" He nodded, "It hurts to breathe but it is not so bad. Would you like to take a walk? I am in need of some brisk air and someone to talk to."
I smiled at his thick French accent, making every word he said sound a little more timid.
     "A walk sounds wonderful, Monsieur. Now, if you'll give me a moment, I will dress myself properly for such an outing."
     He nodded and closed the door behind himself, leaving me alone in the room once more.
Benedict Arnold's wife was the most ostentatiously fashionable woman I knew of, and the clothes in that trunk showed it. The dress was a light blue with small frills on the lining of the bodice and beautiful lace on the sleeves.
     When I put on the stays, I couldn't help but cry out in pain as it dug into the bandages on my side.
     Taking a deep breath, I tied it a little tighter before slipping the outer petticoat over my head. When every piece of the exquisite dress was put together, I looked at myself in the vanity mirror with a smile of satisfaction.
     This may be a little over-the-top for a walk around the camp, I thought, but I have no choice.
     I couldn't wait until Benjamin got back. He would laugh at the extravagant style I wasn't accustomed to and tell me I was becoming the next Peggy Shippen.
     Taking a deep breath, I opened to door to reveal Lafayette waiting patiently on a chair in the hallway.
He stood and offered me his arm with a laugh. "Mrs. Arnold's dress, I presume." I nodded.
The freezing air blew like a rush in our face as we made our way outside. Refreshing. Snow dotted the landscape and the cloaks of soldiers huddled together around meager fires, barely looking up as we walked by. My heart broke for them.
My shoes began to soak through with melted snow and I shivered against Lafayette. "Have they told you about Major André's sentence?" He asked, giving slight nods to the men who stood to salute him as we passed.
"No," I said, my throat tightening, "what is it?" He avoided my eyes. "He is to be hanged tomorrow, Louisa. Major Tallmadge said you would want to know. I'm sorry."
My heart pounded in my chest and I wanted to collapse. He was so kind to me. He was gracious and gentle and understanding and now he would be dead. Was that how he would remember me? The girl he risked his career to save would thank him by letting him be executed?
I knew he was a Tory and that he had corresponded with Arnold and that I should hate him but I didn't. He cared about me and I cared back. Not in a romantic way—he seemed content with my courtship with Benjamin, but it was more than just returning a favor or paying me back for the death of my family.
The cold wind picked up and I bit my lip anxiously, wishing I could just make everything work out. "Does Major Tallmadge plan on marrying you soon?"
I smiled. "I don't know, actually. It is difficult, you know, this whole process. Because of his position and the intensity of his job. And mine for that matter. General Washington has all but forbidden Benjamin to marry because he believes I will be a distraction. And also," I paused, "one of us may not survive this war."
Lafayette seemed lost in thought as we made a slight left turn through the rows of tents, coming upon the beautiful ledge overlooking the Hudson River.
"My wife, Adrienne," he breathed, "I never told her where I was going when I left for America. I never told her I loved her. That I missed her. It is too dangerous and unreliable to send letters anymore. She has only heard from me three times, Louisa, and I have missed the birth and death of my dear daughter Henriette. If you marry Monsieur Tallmadge, do not make my mistake. Love him every second of every day and never let him forget...he will do the same. Take your time though, my dear, his love will still be waiting at the end of this war."
     I patted his arm that was linked around mine and said, "Thank you. You'll see Adrienne soon, I'm sure of it."
     Just then, a group of soldiers approached us from behind, holding handfuls of dirty and tattered clothes and socks. Lafayette stepped between me and them cautiously.
     "Sorry to bother you, Miss, but we were wondering if you could mend our clothes...they haven't been doing us much good lately."
     I looked at their bruised bare feet in the snow and their thin linen cloaks, barely hiding the shaking of their shoulders as they huddled together before us. Lafayette began to tell them to go away, that it wasn't my job to do the mending and I couldn't spend all my time on this.
     "It's alright; I don't mind," I interrupted, looking through the clothes they had given me, "You all are going to need these for the rest of this winter...it has proven itself to be an unforgiving one. Where are your shoes? I can work on those as well if you would like."
     The men exchanged glances and one replied, "They are gone, Miss Adams...stolen or rendered useless long ago." I pursed my lips blinked repeatedly, wishing I could do something more to help them.
"Well, I will make sure you all have adequate shoes and clothing for this winter, do not worry about that. May I ask where you are staying?"
     They pointed a few rows of tents down where there was a small plume of smoke from a campfire and I nodded, hoping to make it back to return the clothes the next morning. The soldiers thanked me profusely as they left and saluted Lafayette respectfully.
     "You have quite a way with these soldiers," he said as we continued our walk through the camp, "they look up to you. I am...what is the word...impressionné."
     I laughed as pulled the clothes to my chest, smelling smoke and the ever present odor of sweat that seemed to follow the camp in all seasons of the year.
     "Louisa!" Someone called from behind us and I turned on my heel to see them. It was Caleb Brewster, with his arms stretched out to embrace me. Grinning, I accepted it and he said, "You seem to have spent a little too much time with the Tories, Louisa. I've never seen ya' wear a dress this expensive for a walk around the camp! It's good to see you."
     I shook my head jokingly and nudged him gently. "This army is a quite lacking when it comes to women's clothes, as you can see. Major General Lafayette was giving me some respite from that wretched room I've been in the past few days. Would you like to join us?"
     Lafayette nodded in agreement at my invitation and Caleb cocked his head at us. "Aren't you wonderin' why I came out to find the two of you?"
     I raised my eyebrows and he answered his own question, "Your little Tallboy is with the prisoner and he asked me to come and find you if you wanted to speak with him yourself. Ya' know, I don't usually listen to him so you better take advantage of my obedience while it lasts."
     Lafayette let out a small chuckle at Caleb's plain-spoken manner. "Here, Mademoiselle," he said, "I will bring your mending work to your room while Lieutenant Brewster brings you to André. I'll meet you there." He bowed deeply and kissed my hand before taking the clothes and heading towards Washington's headquarters.
"Lafayette!" I called after him. He turned and I said, "Merci. It was wonderful to speak with you." He smiled sheepishly and gave me a wave, turning back towards the house.
"Lead the way, Mister Brewster," I said, taking Caleb's outstretched arm in mine. 
     "It would be my honor."