The Best Sleepovers (JohnBro)

Neon Tablecloths

John grinned up at Bro. "Here, I'm a guest here, so I can at least help you set out the food." Bro raised an eyebrow. "Hell no. You are a guest, which is why ya shouldn't have t' help with that. I mean, it's already more than enough that ya plannin' on cookin' for us for the entire week. I'd feel like a horrible host, if I made ya help out with this shit too." John thinks for a minute. 'Nope. I refuse to think about that texan accent.. and how I could just melt hearing it.. aaaannndd I'm doing it again. Gog damn it, me!' John had come out as bisexual last year. Technically he is not gay, so he never actually lied about it before.. 'Careful wording is its own form of magic, if used correctly, hehe. Shit... Bro's still waiting for a response.' "Well, what if I want to help, though? I mean, for one, I like cooking, so cooking for you guys will actually be more fun than anything and two, I like being able to help out. So, would you please let me help out. I can deal with the traumatization of helping set out dinner, tonight when I'm going to bed, haha." 'Shit.. I'm rambling. The last time I got all rambly like this was in middle school with that weird Karkat kid. Why did I stop talking with him again..? Oh yeah.. That guy had some pretty weird views on romance.. Oh gog, what will Dave think, if he finds out that I'm starting to have a crush on his gog damn brother, oh gog! He's going to flip a gasket!'

"Fine, if ya really want t', but I'm just gonna pretend that it's just that ya wanna spend more time with me 'cause I'm such an awesome and badass role model."
John grins, melting a little at that Texan drawl again, before nodding quickly. "Okay, Mr. Strider! You are pretty cool, I'll give you that, haha." Dave throws his hand to his chest in mock offence. "I thought you thought that I was the cool one. What happened to our totally sicknasty matribrony? You wound me. I thought what we had was special!" John pauses, thinking about how weird it was that Dave could keep his face entirely blank throughout that whole little spiel. Bro just smirks. "Translation bein' that ya just gonna go t' ya room and play video games while we set the table, huh? And also, come on, Dave. Ya know I'm the coolest. You are cool beta. I'm the alpha." Dave rolls his eyes hard, behind his shades. "Yeah, sure. Whatever. Since when the hell do we set the table though?" Bro flashstepped over to Dave and placed a finger against the younger Strider's mouth, much to John's amusement. "Shhh.. Let me at least pretend to be a good housekeeper, in front 'a our guest. You're goin' over t' John's place next week, an' when ya meet the dadbert you'll see what I'm up against. I gotta claim the role as alpha caregiver here." Dave raises an eyebrow over his shades. John bursts into laughter.

"Now anyway, time t' set the table. Go play video games, Dave. I'll send Johnny boy here over t' get ya when everythin' is ready." Dave nods. "Okay. Peace out and all that t-t-y-l shit. See y'all soon enough." John pauses. Dave always tried to avoid using Texan slang like that, and alway tried to cover up his accent. "Dave, did you just say y'all?" John asks, stifling giggles. Dave freezes in place, before flash-stepping over to John and putting a finger to his lips. "You heard nothing. Got it, egderp?" John nods, still stifling laughter.

Dave flashsteps to his room, and John bursts into loud laughter. Bro lets a small smirk slip onto his face. "Okay, small Egbert, I think we totally need t' put out a table cloth for the gog damn fanciest pizza lunch in history." John grins, through small giggles, and nods. "You got it, Mr. Strider!" Bro raises an eyebrow, as he walks to the hall closet to get a gog damn bright neon orange tablecloth. "Ya know, I was bein' serious when I picked ya up earlier. Ya can just call me 'Bro'." John thinks for a moment, before looking up at Bro again, apologetically. "Well, you see, it doesn't really feel right for me to call you Bro, when you aren't really my brother.. Sorry, Mr. Strider."

Bro hands John two corners of the eye burning tablecloth, so they can spread it out. Not wanting to make John uncomfortable, but also not wanting to be continuously called something so formal in his own house. He looks John in the eyes, making up his mind, and wow. 'Holy fuck, his eyes are so fucking blue. Let's see, he's tiny, has huge blue eyes, full lips, and almost feminine features. Holy shit... He's a shota, and it's fucking adorable. ..Holy fuck.. I'm fanboying over my little bro's underage friend. What the fuck... Well, there's always age of consent, but he looks so small that it's almost hard to believe he's sixteen.. Wait... Why the everloving fuck am I trying to make this seem okay!? Nope. Fuck this. I hate my mind. Anyway, back on topic, gog damn it!'
"Just call me Dirk then. That's my real name. I don't want ya t' feel uncomfortable, so just think of us as friends, an' call me by my first name."

John grins happily, as he helped spread the retina melting tablecloth across the table. "Okay, Dirk! That'll be just fine!"

After laying out the table cloth, Bro put the pizza boxes, and three paper plates, on the table. "Run up and get the lil' man down for pizza now, 'kay John?" John nods, a bit to happily, already going to do as he says. "Okay, Dirk." He says with a wide grin. "Thanks for letting me help." Bro nods. "No problem, lil' dude." John runs up to get Dave.

Upon arriving at Dave's room, and stepping in, his eyes were assaulted with a fucking neon red table cloth. "Hey, Dave, the pizza's rea- Oh, gog, why!?" "Bro's probably using that gog damn orange tablecloth, isn't he? This one's easier on the eyes."

John's eyes widen in disbelief. "Oh my gog! No! No it's not! What is wrong with you two!?"