leo valdez x reader (book 1)

Don't Let Me Be Gone

'My nose is too big.'

'I'm not skinny enough for Leo.'

'I have under eye bags that no one likes.'

'I'm too pale.'

'I'm ugly.'

'I'm worthless.'

'I bring bad luck.'

'I'm a waste of time.'

'I'm useless.'

'Nobody needs me.'

(This is for the story. You guys are all beautiful.)

You always had one remedy and getaway: music. Music helped you through everything now that your dog couldn't.

You were still having your panic attack, but your phone was in your pocket in your jacket.

With shaky hands, you reached into your pocket and grabbed your phone.

You unlocked it and started playing Twenty Øne Piløts. They were your favorite band because you could relate to most of the songs.

You put it on the song "Truce" because it was one of your favorites. You always wanted to cry because Tyler looked like he was going to cry in the video.

You let your mind slip away into the instruments and lyrics of the music. Listening to Tyler's voice always calmed you.

Even though Leo physically wasn't friends with you, you imagined him being close to you.

Even though you were inside out at the moment, the thought of Leo being beneath your thoughts helped you.

The music playing helped a lot too. Your breathing became better because you were calmed and relaxed.

You were able to stand up and walk, so you went to your nightstand and grabbed a bottle of water.

You drank it to help slow down your heart rate from hyperventilating and raising it up.

I've got two faces
Blurry's the one I'm not
I've got two faces
Blurry's the one I'm not
I need your help to
Take him out
I need your help to
Take him out

You always had two faces you showed. One when you were alone, and the other when you were around people.

When you were around people, you were always happy, cheery, and motivational.

It comes in the package of caring too much and being too nice. You were too nice and cared too much because of your sadness.

You knew what it feels like to be put down everyday. You put yourself down everyday.

You know what it feels like to not be cared for. You experienced people being rude to each other with living in Chicago.

You've witnessed racism, discrimination to gay, bisexual, transgender, and lesbian people.

You always wanted to bring everybody up and help them so they wouldn't feel what you were feeling.

You used your sadness and anxiety to help other people because it's how you became mature and experienced.

Being happy was not the person you were. You were really a heartbroken person with problems of your own.

You didn't let those problems distract you from helping other people and friends though.