He makes you feel insecure [PART 3]

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(A/N: Play video on top before reading on, I highly recommend you do so) 

Shawn's POV

Tears fell from my eyes as I opened the door to see Y/N with her eyes closed. The heart rate monitor was not flatline, I sighed in relief.

"Baby, wake up." I said, stuttering as tears cloud my vision. I shook her lightly as her eyes slowly opened.

"Huh...w-what's going on?" She whispers, possibly forgetting why she's here. 

"Y/N...I'm so sorry. It's all my fault why you're here..." I covered my face with my hands and shook my head.

She begins to sob, I went over to her and caressed her cheek. "No, baby. Don't cry, please..." 

"Shawn, how could you say that? I thought you loved me for how I am, not how you want me to be... I know that I'm not some supermodel, but..." She continues, but tears stop her.

I went up to her and nuzzled my face into her neck as I hugged her. She flinches in pain.

"Shawn! My stomach hurts!" She says, I immediately pulled away and she continues.

"I'm sorry my stomach is unappealing to you..." 

"Y/N, don't say that! You're beautiful the way you are..."

"No, I'm not!"

"YOU ARE TO!!" I scream out of the top of my lungs, this made her a bit scared.

"Shawn, h-how could you...."

"No no baby. I'm sorry I raised my voice, just come here..." I went to her, but she started to breathe abnormally.

"Y/N! You're having a panic attack..." I worried.

"Do what I do." I breathed in slowly and out. She did the same and she managed to calm down.

"S-Shawn, d-do you wanna see the, you know..."

"Cuts? Baby, I-I don't know what to say..." I started but she lifted her shirt up and more tears fell from my eyes as I saw long lines of blood across her stomach. 

"And um, here as well...." She hesitantly says and lifts her shirt up more, I gasped as I saw two small cuts across her left chest, directly above her heart. I covered my mouth and sobbed loudly.

"Why...? Why there?" I asked.

"Because not only is my stomach hurt, but my heart as well. Your words pained both of them.... so I had to.... I just had to..." She sobs as well and I collapsed onto the floor right next to her coma. 

"Y-Y/N, I'm so sorry...." I said for probably the 8th time. 

"Shawn, you got me into this pain, you get me out of it." She says.

"Y/N, no matter what anyone else thinks about you, you will always be beautiful to me, it doesn't matter if you're tall, skinny, short, blonde, whatever. Your style never fails to impress me, as well as your personality. I love every part of you, every single one." I said, she cries at the little speech and I hugged her but not too tight to hurt her.

"Shawn, that was beautiful, but unfortunately I don't think I'll be able to get out of this coma..." 

"Y/N, you're alive and that's what's most important right now. If you died, then..." I sniffled as she looks directly into my eyes. 

"...I-I would've gone with you." I added.

All of a sudden, the heart rate monitor started beeping much more slowly. Is that a sign of trouble!?

"Y/N! A-Are you still alright?" I frantically asked, almost about to break down completely. 

"S-S-Shawn...." She starts to become weak. No! This isn't happening! This can't be! She can't be dying, not right now! 

All of a sudden, a single beep comes and Y/N closes her eyes. I broke down next to her full out crying. The doctor came in and wrapped her completely with the blanket. I grabbed the tissues he gave me earlier and used them to wipe my tears away. 

"I'll let you say your goodbyes..." The doctor says and leaves again. I unwrapped the blanket and saw her emotionless face, eyes closed and chest not moving up and down. 

"Y/N, how could you just leave me like this.... I know I made a mistake, but that doesn't mean you should leave me!" I said to her, expecting a response but she didn't. 

"Baby, I said t-that if you die, then i die with y-you...." I say and kissed her forehead. I took out a bottle of pills from the medicine cabinet and just took it all in one gulp.

I went over back to Y/N and lay down next to her, holding her hand and nuzzling my face in her shoulder.

"Baby, we'll be together again... just wait a few more minutes." I told her and started to feel drowsy. Within minutes, I blacked out. Forever.

I died laying down next the love of my life, never letting go of her hand and never leaving her side.

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