Behind the Scenes of Life

Chapter 1

One of the biggest mistakes you can make is falling in love with your best friend. It’s such a cliché if you think about it, but when it happens… it’s no cliché at all. It’s horrible and terrifying. They say falling in love is one of the best things, well I disagree. Clearly whoever made this statement did not fall under the wrath of rejection. I was one of the unlucky ones that made the mistake of falling in love with the wrong person. I did see it coming since eighth grade though. We were close and hung out frequently at school whenever we had a chance and people started making their own conclusions that we were dating. The worst thing was that I started to believe them. I found that hypothesis inevitable. Much to my despair, it never did happen though. As close as we were in eighth grade, it all came to a halt when we reached ninth grade. We were separated into different classes and we kind of just drifted apart from there. We saw each other when we had certain classes together, but that was it basically. It was as if the previous year didn’t happen at all and it didn’t hurt much then because I didn’t realise how I actually truly felt about him. I still remember when we had a ball in ninth grade. He sat at the table next to mine and he complemented me on how I looked. I was wearing a long purple-black dress and I felt pretty, something that’s a rare occurrence with me. I have a relatively low self-esteem. I was on the floor where the rest of the ninth grade students were dancing when he came up to me and whispered in my ear that I looked pretty. It felt amazing to be complemented by him, to be honest. I remember hoping that he liked me too, but I didn’t want to directly believe that in fear of him not really feeling anything for me.

In year ten, we were placed back in the same home class-which we’d be in until our matric year. It was early in the year that I told him I liked him. I had missed out the first week of school though because my family and I had went on a family vacation to Germany.

I still don’t know what made me admit to Chace that I felt something towards him. It was a rather brave as well as stupid move on my behalf. Just a few days ago, before I admitted my feelings to him, I was walking in the passage with my friend, Art. The two of us were walking with her other friend, Sibo. Sibo told me about a conversation she had had with Chace, she couldn’t recall when though. Me, unable to contain my curiosity and interest, asked her to tell me all about it.

“You spoke to him about me?” I asked her. I was intrigued immediately.

“Yes. We were both waiting for the bus and then I just asked him about you,” Sibo answered nonchalantly.

“What did you ask him?” I tried not to sound too eager.

“See the thing is we were standing under the tree and then I said ‘Chace, are you and Jane a couple?’ He said no and asked me why so many people think so and I told him it was because it looked so. Then he asked me if the two of you would make a good couple and I said yes. He also added that he thinks you only see him as a friend.”

I couldn’t believe my ears when she said that. That was the closest I ever came to finding out what exactly he felt towards me. It was at that moment the idea of telling him how I felt, started growing in my mind. I wanted to set him straight, I didn’t see him as just a friend. Both of us were afraid of the same thing. I started hoping and that was not the best thing to do. At all.

 I still remember the day I told him clearly though, it was a Tuesday. All of the grade nine classes were sitting, class by class in alphabetical order in the hall. Each Tuesday we had to go the hall in the morning where were briefed on events as a grade. Because we sat in alphabetical order, Chace sat in front of me in the hall. Next to my class on the right was the class of my friend, Kina. Kina, like Art and Sibo, was dark in complexion and had plaited braids. They were my friends because they were just the right amount of crazy, like all of my friends and me included.