So with my other stories i gave you the short version of things but i guess i'll go in depth here because it's my last story.
So, i have always been lost not really knowing where to go or what moves to make but now it's spiked. I feel so lost and heartbroken and i'm depressed. I am suffering from severe depression to the point to where i can't pretend to be happy anymore i can't lie and say everything is ok.
I'm hurting and i can feel my heart breaking as i type because it's so hard for me to admit it. I don't want to come back until i can be genuinely happy because i haven't been genuinely happy in almost 9 years.
The last time i was genuinely happy was when i was 7 years old and i'm 15 about to turn 16 in 3 short months. It's been so long since i was genuinely happy and i want that back.
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I want to be happy and to do that i'm going to have to make tough decisions and make them fast. I am going to have to talk to people i don't want to in order to be happy again. I love you guys and i don't want this to be goodbye. I'm not typing this for sympathy in any way, i'm typing it so you know why you won't see any activity from me for a while. I know that this is what i need, and lately i have been reading my bible and actually understanding what it means. I found a couple verses that i like about different things.
"Come to me, all you who are weary and i will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for i am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls"- Matthew 11:28-29
"Trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your paths"- Proverbs 3: 5-6
"Fear not, for i am with you, be not dismayed, for i am you god: I will strengthen you, i will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand."- Isaiah 41:10
"Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary, the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about seeking whom he may devour."- Peter 5:8
I know that i will have you guys support, hwaiting. I love you, bye bye
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