Ambitchous (Deputy Parrish)(DISCONTINUED)

Chapter 58

|Scar Stilinski|

"Scar, get up. Dad's gone."

I immediately jumped up out of my slumber and we searched the hospital. We found him in the morgue, next to Donovan's body bag.

"The story Theo told me about the library. That's how it happened. Except it didn't happen to him." Dad said to me.

We both nodded, "Yeah."

"I can't protect you if I don't know the truth. Did you really feel like you couldn't tell me?"

"I couldn't tell anyone." I mumbled, tracing my tattoo.

Dad sighed, "Did you think that I wouldn't believe that it was self-defense?"

"What if it wasn't? What if I told you I wanted him dead?" 

I glanced at Stiles, who remained silent.

"I'd believe you. I also believe that wanting someone dead and murdering them are two very different things."

I crossed my arms, "Yeah, but what if the judge didn't think so?"

"Then to hell with the judge. Scar, it was self-defense, and I would destroy every shred of evidence to protect you if I had to. I would burn the whole sheriff's station to the ground." My father declared.

"What about upholding the law? What about Kira?" Stiles asked.

"Kira was a mistake. I guess I'm learning how to bend."

"So, what, it just goes away?"

"Not for you. The problem now is how to bear this burden. This kind of thing is not at all uncommon in law enforcement. A fatal mistake. A partner who dies. Or one who gets paralyzed. Stiles... Scar, you carry that with you. Sometimes it doesn't truly feel okay again until there's a kind of counterbalance."

"Like what?" Stiles asked.

Dad thought about it for a minute, "Like instead of taking a life, you manage to save one. Something like that can help, but maybe only for a moment, but the real conflict you're having now is between your head and your heart. Your head knows that the only crime you committed was surviving. Your heart still thinks it was murder. So I guess you gotta get your heart to catch up to your head."

I shrugged, "I feel like it's more than guilt though, you know, I feel like... I'm becoming who... well, what... I used to be."

"You are. Not entirely, but you can stop it by forgiving yourself. Since that's not always the easiest thing to do, then maybe you start by forgiving someone else. Someone who probably really needs it."

"Someone like Scott." Stiles said quietly.
__________________________

"Is that my laptop?" Dad asked.

"Yeah." Stiles mumbled, as he continued to type.

"You have the password to it?"

"We have all your passwords. You know they just brought in another body from last night?" I said, looking over Stiles' shoulder.

"Yeah, I was hoping you wouldn't find out. Now give me my damn computer."

Dad reached for the computer, but Stiles leaned away.

"Hang on, hang on. I think there's some footage missing, or something missing in the footage."

"I think there's something missing in your head." I heard our father mumble.