A Momentary Lapse Of Reason

Summer Reading Program

Summary: Carlos suffers from heat exhaustion after being out in the Sand Wastes too long, the team aid in the rescue of the children from the library and Jeffries considers volunteering for a local cause.

"Carlos," Jeffries sighed down the phone. "You've been out in the Sand Wastes fer hours. It's absolutely boilin'. It's not safe."

"I won't be too long." Carlos balanced the phone between his shoulder and his ear. "It's just this incredible fixture of land. The gravimeter is off the charts! Five times the normal amount of gravity usually present in such an area..."

Jeffries rolled his eyes and waited for Carlos' science rant to finish. He had to admire Carlos' optimism recently. Since he'd been on his first date with Cecil, Carlos had been on a constant high. He was first up and ready to go at the crack of dawn. Unfortunately, he'd been neglecting sleep on occasion again, but it wasn't showing too much.

"I know, Carlos." Jeffries said. "Just be careful, 'kay?"

"I'll be fine. Scientists are always fine."

Jeffries chose that point to hang up the phone before Carlos started talking about his experiment again. He'd have to drive out there or Carlos probably wouldn't come back for a week.

~

"The Summer Reading Program for children and teens has begun at the Night Vale Public Library. This comes as an alarming surprise, given that the program was abolished by the City Council thirty years ago. Though parents and teenagers have asked on several occasions to reinstate the program, the City Council has maintained its position, citing lack of taxpayer funds, the extreme danger posed by books, the peril of exposing children to librarians, and of course, the incident that precipitated the ban, which the town's older residents will refer to only as 'The Time Of Knives'."

"Are they crazy?!" Ellie fumed. "Putting children in the presence of librarians?!"

"The City Council always do things for a reason." Natalia hastily clarified. Ellie had an issue with remembering that everything was bugged. It was only a matter of time before the enthusiastic biochemist ended up being arrested, Natalia sighed.

Dr Green's blonde curls seemed to bounce for emphasis as she started speaking again.

"Yeah, but they're just kids!"

"We can't do anything, Ellie."

They were interrupted by the door opening and a groaning sound coming from it.

"Through 'ere. That's it, easy does it." Jeffries said gruffly, hauling up Carlos. "Dr Johnson, can ya grab him some water an' a bucket."

"Sure. Why a bucket?"

Carlos answered by retching into the nearest plant pot. Jeffries stood next to him grimly.

"Good point. On it." She sped off down the corridor. Ellie stepped forward and felt his forehead.

"He was out in the sun?"

Jeffries nodded. "A good few hours. No shade."

"Bloody hell, Carlos." Ellie muttered. "He's burning up. My guess is heat exhaustion. We need to lower his core body temperature."

"Some summer tips to beat the heat. First off, have you tried to reason with the heat? Humans, temperatures, angels, and chairs are all equally real and sentient, which is to say that we're all not-real, nor are any of us actually sentient, but give reason a shot. It has never, not once in history worked, but it might just work this time. If the heat won't listen to reason, try denying that it's hot."