Out Of My Mind

End

Lydia
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I sat in the chair, Stiles unconsciously propped up next to me. It had been days since I had spoken to him, and months since he had been normal, since he knew who I really was. Still, I'd prefer him not know who I am to this. This... Staring at him as he doesn't move, is worse than anything.

Scott stood behind the two of us. Chase started to walk towards my side, but Deaton spoke.

"Chase, you're in charge of watching your brother. I'll watch the two of them." Deaton said. He looked at Scott and then at me.

"Lydia... We don't know how long you'll be in his head, and we also don't know what you're going to be faced with, or what the outcome could be. You could both come out completely fine... But normally things like this come with a consequence. Are you sure you want to do this?..." Deaton asked. I blinked before looking at Stiles.

No awkward or clumsy movements, no sarcastic comments, no honey brown eyes. That's what I would lose if I decided not to risk my own life. No more tracing the lines on the palms of his hands, no more restless nights where we'd talk till we fell asleep, no more eyelashes that look so long that they could tangle, but never do. No more looking at his cutely spread out moles or listening to his raspy sweet "I love you", spoken in the middle of the night or the middle of the day or the middle of anywhere.

No more Stiles.

Could I give up? Could I throw all that away, just to save myself from the risk of losing my life?

No. I couldn't. Because what's the point of living without him?

I turned back to Deaton. "Im sure." I said. Deaton paused and then nodded, looking up at Scott, then back to me.

"Scott won't be with you this time. It was easy for him to go with you when you were both separate but... You're connected. For him to go in with you he'd have to break the bond, and he can't. The only advise I have for you is to make it to Stiles and save him. It's not much but... It's all I have." Deaton says. I nod and sigh, leaning back into the chair.

"Ready?" Scott says.

I glance towards Chase and he gives me a nervous look, but I quickly look away.

"Ready." I say.

He sinks his nails into my neck, and I gasp in pain before going unconscious.
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I was walking once again, dressed in all white. The white dress that I was wearing matched the white abyss that surrounded me. All sides were surrounded by white, nothing in front or behind me.

I walked for what seemed like ages, yet my feet didn't hurt. I couldn't describe the temperature of the room or the lighting because it didn't seem to really have any. I was just... There. Existing. The only thing I could explain was the feeling I had... The completely neutral feeling that I had. I wasn't sad, or happy. I was just walking. Walking on and on and on.

And then, in the distance, I saw him. He was there, his back to me. I started to slowly walk towards him.

"Stiles?..." I said.

This time he slowly started to turn around, finally seeing me.

"Lydia?... What're you doing here?" He said. I started to run towards him, and he did the same. But for some reason, we couldn't make it to each other. We were stuck, in an endless running cycle. We couldn't be together.