Secrets (ON HOLD)

26. It's a Shame

Sapphira's POV

Warning : You might or might not need tissues while reading this chapter. Trust me, I did.

We should just kill them.
We should just kill them.
We should just kill them.

These words rung in my head like a bell. I could feel a weight on my chest and it felt like my heartbeat was strong and loud enough to shake all of me, rattling me to the core. I slowly turned towards Harry, his face was masked with a horrified expression and I was sure that I mirrored the exact same expression. Whoever these people were, they wanted to kill us.

As I thought about my life, I was surprised. There weren't many people who'd miss me if I died. Aunt and uncle, maybe. But they'd be better off without me. I was probably a burden on them. Cassandra was dead. Zara hated me. The only person I had learned to confide in was my own self. And Harry, he made me stronger, teaching me to lean on my own self. He had somehow managed to become my strength and my weakness. He mattered to me to an extent that was surprising.

I realised that his life mattered to me far more than my own did. I felt the need to protect him. I came to the conclusion that this green eyed man, sitting beside me, meant more to me than anyone or anything in this world. And if I had to choose to save any one of us, I'd choose him in a heartbeat. Because, I'd rather die than live in a world without him. A world without Harry Styles could mean nothing to me.

This man had consumed every bit of my heart and my soul and I hadn't even realised that till now. It was a shame, it took me standing face to face with death to realise that.

I should've known. I should've known that those butterflies weren't there without a reason. That those smiles, those tears, the jealousy, all of it had a meaning. I have been in love with Harry for a long time. I guess, I just wasn't strong enough to admit it.

Harry's soft voice broke my thoughts and I realised I was sobbing and he was trying to calm me down.

"Hey, Sapphie. We're going to be okay. We'll get out of here. We'll be fine."

And I smiled, believing in his words even when I knew that it wasn't just me, he was trying to convince. That, he wasn't sure of it himself.

In that moment, I felt braver than I ever had. I cupped his face in my hands and said. "Thank you."

His expression was sad, the saddest I had ever seen him. He knew that I wasn't just thanking him for trying to make me feel better. There was more to my gratefulness. I was trying to thank him for every single smile, every single moment of joy, he had given me. I was thanking him for somehow making me feel alive, adding excitement to my tranquil life. Before I met him, I was satisfied with what I had. He made me want to taste freedom. He taught me to rebel. He taught me to be confident. He taught me to dance to the beat of life as if no one could watch me. He brought out me in myself. For that, I was grateful to him.

I thanked him because from that moment onward, I promised myself to do anything and everything I had to, to allow him a chance at life. In that moment, the uncertainty of our lives hit me harder than it ever had. The moments in this world that we're granted are numbered. We let gloom take over our world when gloom is nothing but merely the absence of happiness. About happiness, you can only see it as long as you want to. The moment we stop looking for it, is the moment we lose our chance at it.

I let my head rest on his chest as I listened to his heartbeat as long as I could.

"It's okay, Harry. It's okay. You know, I don't have a lot to lose. You do. If you get a chance, I want you to grab it and pursue happiness. Don't let me anchor you to an awful fate. Please. I want you to be happy. I.."