The Monster [H.S.]

Chapter 46

"Where is she?!" He repeats, the gun shaking in his hand.

"I'd tell you but it seems you already know." I seethe.

He looks at me for a couple of seconds and let's his suspicions become reality before his face twists in anger and he pulls back the hammer, and as he's about to shoot I smack the gun from his hand and watch it fly across the hallway. His fist reels back and pushes forward and I stop it with my hand before it reaches his target - my face - and bend his arm back, watching him hiss in pain. Is he really the Intrinsicus replacement commander? He really is no match for her.

"I'm going to try not to snap your neck right now for Annabelle's sake." I say through gritted teeth.

"For Annabelle's sake? What, you like her? Did you like her when you killed her brother in front of her? Or Steve? Or her father? Or her mother? Did you like her then?" He taunts and my face twists and I feel myself subconsciously squeeze his arm harder. "Did you like her when you killed her?"

"I did not fucking kill her!" I scream in his face, and in an instant I have him held by the neck against the wall.

"Really? So you're saying if you never abducted her she would still have been dead right now?" He spits but I hear the sadness behind his voice.

"I carried her dead body in from the field when everyone else left. Where were you? What did you do?" I interrogate him.

"I was sending scared and defenceless humans back to their homes. Once the barrier blew it was manic. Everyone was running and screaming. I called her name but I couldn't see her and she didn't respond and I figured she would be okay since she has these...these...powers and I just - I thought - I thought she'd be okay." He admits, his voice slowly becoming more quiet and I can see his fight within him whether to blame himself or not.

"I didn't see her either. There was so many people." I agree, my grip on him loosening. "There was so many people but she still died alone." My voice betrays me and I let go of him completely.

"Why do you care if she died alone?" He half criticises.

I look at him and think about my answer. Before her I never thought about my answer. Before her my answer would have been a straight 'show me where I asked and shut the fuck up' but now I'm not sure how to answer. Because now after her, I'm different. After her I'm better.

But without her I'm lost.

"A lot of people round here do." I vaguely answer.

"But why you? I hear you're the heartless of them all." He mocks.

"That's true; I am heartless, but I still cared about her."

"What? I-Please explain this to me cause you've completely lost me. You cared for her? For Annabelle?"

"Yes." I clarify.

"So that must mean that she opened up to you enough to make you care because God knows you can't care for the stone wall she masked herself with."

"Yes."

"Yes she opened up or yes she was a stone wall?"

"Both." I shrug and he nods slowly.

"So she, you know, told you things? About, herself?" He asks, his tone in disbelief and the shock more than evident on his face.

"Yes, Annabelle told me things." I summarise impatiently.

I don't know whether I dropped some sort of accidental hint or it was just blatantly obvious but something inside him just seemed to...click.

"What the fuck? Annabelle doesn't open up to anyone. She's a stone wall. She's an emotionless, unloveable and futile creature that lived only to kill you and your family and your friends. Either she lost her fucking mind or you're lying."

"I'm not lying, but the insanity part might just be true."

"She loved you." He says, and my blood stops in my veins.

"What?"

"She loved you." He repeats, my body frozen.

"No she didn't." I argue.

He stops talking, a tense silence looming over us as I await what he says next. Silence. And silence. And...

"You fucking brainwashed her! You brainwashed her to love you! You bastards!" He screams, taking a knife from his back pocket and aiming it at my shoulder, and while I deflect it he aims it at my other shoulder, but as I deflect that he slyly stabs it through my stomach. Little bastard.

It hurts, partially, but it won't make me cower. Like I've always said; I was built to not feel pain.

I pull the knife out my gut, a slight sting causing my eyebrows to furrow before I grab the back of his neck and pull it forward to the blade, the sharp edge digging into his thin layer of skin, a single nudge and I'll blow his artery and watch him bleed out in front of me. I used to find it fascinating, but now I just find it a nuisance.

"We did not fucking brainwash her. Well, we did a couple of times, but we stopped that. I stopped it. And it was never to make her love me."

"The Annabelle I knew would never love you monsters."

"The Annabelle you knew was very different from the Annabelle who died a week ago!" I shout in his face, sweat dripping down my forehead.

"Let me go." He demands through his teeth but I don't oblige. He has to listen to me. He has to understand.

"No."

"If you cared for her at all you'll let me go."

"Don't use her against me!" I scream, readjusting the knife against his throat.

"Why not?!" He shouts back.

"Because it's not fair!"

"Why?!" He shouts, our voices getting increasingly louder.

"Because she was all I have that I care about!" My voice rips from my throat and I let go of him, her face fresh in my mind reminding me of what she would want.
"Look, I don't like you. I don't like your people, but I liked her. But she was one of you and one of us, which one more was up to her, but she's gone now. She's gone and she's all I had so whatever she had is mine now and she had you so...I-fuck. I'll-I can help you...with things. If you need help."

"I don't need your help."

"I'm not saying you need it I'm saying its there if you want it." I snap. God, I hate that I love her.

"Go kill Paul Higgins."

"What? No!"

"Why? Annabelle hated him most of all."

"No she didn't. Not in the end." I shake my head.

"You must have brainwashed her, for the love of God! She had no ounce of anything but hatred for that man from the minute her dad died. I don't believe that, not for a minute!"

"Believe what you fucking like but that is who Annabelle died as, whether you like it or not." I snap, my temper rising and I try to bring myself down rapidly before I lose control.

Weirdly, being near Nathan brought me down from my high at some point. Maybe I just felt more connected to her, or maybe he makes me numb he's so annoying.

"Don't tell me who my own cousin was when you've known her for 5 minutes and most likely spent the time torturing her!"

"5 minutes? 5 minutes? You've left her here for 11 months! If you thought we were torturing her for 11 months why didn't you come get her?!"

"I'm not having this conversation with you, you fucking scum. I won't waste another breath in your presence." He spits, his face twisted in disgust.

"Don't da-" I begin but I'm cut off by a voice at the door.

"Harry!" Liam yells. "She's gone. Annabelle's gone. Her body's gone. They've taken it." He says, and before I even realise what I've done Nathan's lifeless body slumps at my feet, his broken neck twisted so his blank face stares at me. Emotionless. Empty. Dead. And I ask myself:

What have I done?