Chapter 8: The Social Scenes

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Sup sup sup! This is the latest installment about going out in the social scene! Hope you enjoy!


Reece: Yo, yo, yo ready for another round?

Clyde: Why do you say yo, yo, yo all the fucking time?
Dean: This isn't the 60's.
Roger: Oh fuck this shit, my mother didn't pack any cupcakes.
Brandon: You're 21 there's only one kind of cupcake you should receive.

Reece: Uh because it's fucking awesome? Anyway, we're going to be talking about going out on the social scene. Be on topic on this one okay?

Clyde: Roger, Skype isn't a social scene by the way.
Dean: Especially when the guys show you their chickens.
Roger: I don't swing that way.
Brandon: I'm sure you do when the big turkeys are involved.

Reece: Okay anyway, do you mind if a girl is a Morgan?

Definition of a Morgan: Derived from the best fucking alcoholic drink in the world, Captain Morgan. When a girl is a Morgan it means that she's a drunkard like the homeless man across the street except she has no penaynay... which makes all the difference.

Clyde: The last thing I want is some boob person throwing up around me.
Dean: Once this girl was so drunk she started to dance to the spice girls.
Roger: What the mickeymouse where you doing at a club that plays spice girls?
Brandon: The best expression you can think of is "what the mickeymouse"? Have you ever heard of a word called fuck?

Reece: Frankly, you guys swear too much anyway.

Clyde: Fuck you and your fucking "frankly" word.
Dean: Go piss in a pink unicorn bush Reece.
Roger: Frankly is such a weird word. Frank. Frank. Frankie. Franky. Franky-Pranky. Frankie drankie a bankie.

Reece: Okay! Moving on, girls with short dresses in clubs, is it hot?

Clyde: Depends on the ass.
Dean: Depends on the dress, Clyde!
Roger: If the girl's dress is too short and she be dancing all night, she better not back that sweaty ass on me.
Brandon: I doubt any ass would wanna "back up on you" Roger.

Reece: Right I would love to speak about asses that are perspiring but we should move on. Where should the perfect date be? Should it be at a bar or at a club?

Clyde: On the kitchen counter, naked.
Roger: Calm your tits, Dean.
Brandon: Maybe at a restaurant like normal people?

Reece: Okay! Best pick up line when you see a hottie at the club?

Clyde: Nice lips and no I'm talking about the ones I can't see.
Dean: Yeah when she has acne on her vagina we'll see how you like it then.
Roger: Wait, do people get acne down there?
Brandon: Acne and Vagina should never be in the same sentence together.

Reece: I agree with Brandy on that one, man. Okay guys, what's your best signature move to pick up chicks?

Clyde: I show them my chicken!
Dean: One day somebody's going to roast that chicky.
Roger: I do the motherfucking Hokey Pokey!
Brandon: Real gangster, Roger. Real gangster.

Reece: So what should a girl actually wear to clubs and bars.

Clyde: Her vagina, always wear a vagina! A little vag goes a long way.
Dean: She should wear a shirt that shows boobs but covers the rest.
Roger: She should smell like a prostitute. That always does the trick.
Brandon: A dress that shows ass but not all of it.

Reece: Have you ever had one night stands?

Clyde: Yep, yesterday with Reece's mom.
Dean: No, do I look like Clyde.
Roger: Once Clyde took Viagra and "it" stood for a whole night.
Brandon: Ah! Good times!

We all began to recall that time when Clyde's chicken didn't want to relax. It was hilarious. This led to names like "Always up" and "Peek-a-boo" for ten minutes before we settled down.

Reece: In the future men have to stay at home and take care of the kids while the women bring home the bacon. How does this sound?

Clyde: Sounds like fucking shit.
Dean: So do women still have vaginas?
Roger: Man I hate kids. They're so little and stupid.
Brandon: They're children, what the fuck do you expect?

Reece: If you suddenly woke up one day and found you have turned into a woman, what would you do?

Clyde: I'd feel my boobs for an hour and then I would scream bloody Mary.
Dean: Also make a sex tape and then scream bloody Mary.
Roger: Do the Hokey Pokey and then scream bloody Mary.
Brandon: I would be a lesbi and then scream bloody Mary.

Reece: Have you ever been caught doing the masties?

Definition of Masties: When one plays with ones chicken by oneself. Often a vagina is not present.

Clyde: No, I usually masternap. Masternap means to sleep after doing the masties. Yeah real original, I know.
Dean: Guys are usually ninjas with these kind of things.
Roger: On Skype?
Brandon: How the fuck does somebody catch you on Skype?

Reece: 10 years from now, Roger is the next Steve Jobs! (The dude who created Apple Inc) He has millions of dollars and thousands of women throwing themselves at his feet while the rest of you are insignificant and most likely have five or more children and a dead end job. What do you have to say for yourselves?

Clyde: I'll kill myself with a fucking panda teddy bear.
Dean: I'd start prostitution, seriously.
Roger: Fuck yeah, bitches!
Brandon: Someone will murder him over Skype anyway.

Reece: And the final question! Any tips on how girls can get guys to notice them?

Clyde: Flash me your boobs.
Dean: Have a vagina, that always works.
Roger: Put your left leg in and then put your left leg out, put your left leg in and you shake it all about.
Brandon: Never attract the attention of the guys above me... TRUST ME.


And that's it! Hope you enjoyed this one =)

QUESTION: Worst pet name you've ever been called?

Answer it yo.

Until next time!









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