Chapter 1: Seeing A Girl You Like For The First Time

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Chapter 1: Seeing A Girl You Like For The First Time

Today our topic is on “The first meeting with a girl”. Some of you might find it interesting to delve into our brains to figure out what exactly guys like us think when we see a girl we want to bang- I mean date. So here are the questionsand answers! Enjoy!

Please don't take this too seriously, we don't want any of you ending up like us... single and alone. 


Reece: Alright, ready guys?

Clyde (Manwhore): Where them girls at!
Dean (Blondie): Huh? For what?
Roger (Nerd): Extremely. *Starts singing Born this Way*
Brandon (Badass): I’m always ready except when people want me to be ready, then I’m never ready.

Reece: What is the first thing on your mind when you see a hot girl?

Clyde (Manwhore): A hot girl or a girl I like? There’s a difference.
Dean (Blondie): She’s hot.
Roger(Nerd): Wow Dean, wasn’t that obvious? I agree with Clyde, there is a difference because sometimes I want to hold them like they do in Texas please.
Brandon: Yeah man, if you going to ask questions least make them sound smart. P.S Roger, stop quoting Poker Face.

Reece: Fine! What is the first thing on your mind when you see a girl you want to date? Better?

Clyde (Manwhore): Hmm I wonder if she thinks I’m hot or I’m sexy. It’s really a tough question.
Dean (Blondie): I want to date her.
Roger (Nerd): We should kick Dean out this group, his answers are predictable. My answer is: “Shawty had them Apple Bottom Jeans, boots with the fur.”
Brandon (Badass): Did someone just fucking quote Get Low? My answer: She looks alright, if she’s interested I’d date her if she’s not who the hell cares?

Reece: Okay Roger, tone down on the lyrics. Anyway, moving on. Do you make the first move?

Clyde (Manwhore): I have to look at her boobs first to decide whether she’s worth my energy.
Dean (Blondie): Well, if she’s not stubborn then I wouldn’t mind!
Roger (Nerd): Most girls are stubborn, Dean.
Brandon (Badass): They’re stubborn when the only thing you humped is your mousepad, Roger.

Reece: Ouch, Burn for Roger! Ten points for Dean who actually answered the question. What exactly is your type?

Clyde (Manwhore): She must have a vagina.
Dean (Blondie): My type is sweet and funn- wait, did someone say vagina? Where? Where!
Roger (Nerd): Huh, where is a vag? Is it a full view or like camel toe? I like a girl with a sense of humor and low to maintain.
Brandon (Badass): Cute, calm and a bit of sexiness. I’m still looking for the vagina sighting.

Reece: Please can the word vagina be refrained during the interview. What’s the minimum age difference you think is socially acceptable.

Clyde (Manwhore): Five years or older. I like older woman. HOT.
Dean (Blondie): That’s just wrong, you know some girl in china was 5 and pregnant?
Roger (Nerd): Eww, Dean do you Google shit like that?
Brandon (Badass): You guys a fucking retards. A 3 year age difference is alright. Oh and Reece, Vagina.

Reece: Is that what you have, Brandy? Alright, would you kiss on the first date?

Clyde (Manwhore): Kiss? Are you serious? On the first date? I bang!
Dean (Blondie): Maybe a small peck on the cheek so that she doesn’t think I’m a Manwhore. *Cough* Clyde.
Roger (Nerd): Yeah probably.
Brandon (Badass): Roger, he doesn’t mean blow a kiss through Skype. Oh and if it seems like she wants to make-out then let the force be with her.

Reece: If someone tells you that your crush is a… slut, what would you do?

Clyde (Manwhore): I would bloody run around fist pumping the air!
Dean (Blondie): Oooooh sluts? I don’t do sluts.
Roger (Nerd): I would start singing “I’m in Love with a Stripper,”
Brandon (Badass): Not that I care, long as she’s not a prossie when we’re dating.

Reece: Advice time! Help this guy on Yahoo Answers.

I like this girl! I’m friends with her on facebook and thats about it. i want to maybe hang out with her more but i dont want to be wierd and i dont know what to say... i dont want to work through my friend to get her i want to do it on my own. what should i say on facebook to her if shes online, if anything? can you tell me exactly what to say? how do i give her signs im interested without being wierd? im a 16 year old boy, and girls have told me im cute but ive got moderate acne with a decent body...

Clyde (Manwhore): Tell her that she’s the most beautiful girl you have ever seen. Girls like that shit. Does she have some nice tatas?
Dean (Blondie): Tatas? As in boobs? Just be honest with her! Maybe she already knows.
Roger (Nerd): Wow, that’s a lot of spelling errors.
Brandon (Badass): Tell her you’ve seen better and you don’t like her. She would seek attention from you for the rest of your life.

Reece: Final question, what do you think girls should do in order to attract guys?

Clyde (Manwhore): Victoria’s Secret. Wear it, live it, be it.
Dean (Blondie): She should have a vagina.
Roger (Nerd): She should be herse- Wait, did someone say vagina? Vaggy!
Brandon (Badass): She shouldn’t do jack if she’s going to attract the guys above me.

Reece: We’ve reached the end, any final answers?

Clyde (Manwhore): I have a Blackberry! Invite me on- This sentence was removed as we felt the user’s privacy and life might be at risk.
Dean (Blondie): Clyde, you are now in the running to be America’s Next Whore.
Roger (Nerd): I have Skype! Please Add me on- This sentence was removed as we felt that if you added this user on Skype, you would have nightmares until you’re 65.
Brandon (Badass): Until next time, fuck off!


And we’ve reached the end! Please fan us if you thought this was helpful/funny or just a load of bull. We would really appreciate it.

If you have any ideas on other subjects you want us to answer then post on our wall or inbox us. If you just want to talk, hell send us a message. One of us will answer but like I said before, beware we are a weird lot.