Torn Tears

Blurred

I could lay in his arms forever. I think I love him. Or I'm so close the line  between like and love is blurred.

"Do you still want to go out tonight?" He asks, breaking the comfortable silence.

The urge to say no is so loud, but I need to know what I'm turning down. "Depends on where we go."

His voice is barely a whisper. If my head wasn't just below his mouth, I would not hear him. "My parents."

I sit up. His hands fall to my hips. I shiver. He doesn't move.

"Do they know?" I'm trying not to feel his hands and I'm trying to focus.

He nods then shakes his head. "I called my dad at work and he had his suspicions. Usually, I don't go more than a couple of days without talking to them. Dad knows how we are the shop, always talking about things we shouldn't. He figured I got into trouble, but he never thought they would hurt you instead of me. I explained everything and he yelled at me for everything before Mom settled him down. Then, I had to explain the mess to her. She sided with me. She said she would want it to be her if Dad had gotten into the same situation." He takes a deep breath and rushes it out with his next words. "Then, she said you would have the same attitude because it's obvious how much you love me."

Present tense. How much I love him.

"Yes." I need to meet them, especially his mother.

"Really?" He tilts his head toward me.

"I need to."

"It took me forever the first time to get you to go to their house." He smiles sadly.

"Don't look so down. We're still together and they didn't take that." I offer him my best shot at a happy smile.

"Penmanship and passion." He mutters.

"Lucas?"

"Yeah."

"What was that you said?"

"Penmanship and passion. The things they couldn't take from you. Your handwriting is sloppy. You have twice the heart of anybody else I know." He laughs, a soft, broken thing.

"You do, too."

"What?"

"You too. You have twice the heart of anyone else I know."

He shakes his head. "Jess, I'm the only person you know."

"Yes. But you still have twice the heart of anyone else. I'm sure of it." I give him a shy smile.

He pulls me close to him and I sigh, content.

"We're never going anywhere unless we move, are we?"

"That's okay." I press my cheek into his shoulder.

Rewind:

The same cheek that is leaning on my loving rock was once, twice, too many times struck by an unloving hand. I feel the blows, each one its own separate and apart from the rest.

I gasp, cupping my cheek.

Lucas has a strange look on his face. "Did I hurt you?"

I shake my head. Never.

I feel him looking at my face, but I don't lower my hand. I can feel the sting as if it were real.

"Your mother used to hit you there. I picked you up for a date once and I could see a bruise beneath your makeup."

I don't tell him how close he is to the truth. I go for the lightest part. "I wear makeup?"

"No." He laughs. "Not much, anyway. And only seldom. That's why it was so noticeable that you were trying to cover it up."