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so its come to my attention recently that maybe i should stop trying to be funny irl. forever.


my sense of humour has been corrupted by the internet, so my jokes consist of a lot of dark things that normal non-internet people definitely do not find funny. i can't make casual existential crisis jokes without anyone asking if i'm okay...and maybe thats a good thing?


friend: hey there, issy! what are you up to today?

me: oh y'know, pondering my existence and questioning everything i've ever achieved. the usual.

friend: *is horrified* what the fuck, are you okay?


i constantly feel like i need to explain my jokes, which sucks because if you have to explain your joke it's not funny. but, if i said that hypothetical joke on the internet i'd probably get a few laughs. i mean, you guys think i'm funny, right? (probably not.)


and growing up makes me realise that i'm just becoming more bitter as i get older. i'm sure i'm not the only one who feels this way, but i swear to god if another 11-year-old says damn daniel i'm gonna punch them in the face. that meme needs to die. asap.


also, a lot of my jokes are me joking about my sexuality. like, if theres a squiggly line on a page i'll probably point to it and say something alone the lines of "haha, that line is about as straight as me!" i don't mean to put people in an awkward situation, its just sometimes my speech filter doesn't work and i end up joking about death or something. 


and i'm not complaining, its a good thing that not everyone has my sense of humour. if we all found the exact same things funny the world would be such a boring place. for example, my older brother thinks kevin hart is hilarious, and i could not disagree more. 


comedy is subjective, which is why some people like certain comedic things and other people don't. i could talk to someone about memes that i think are the funniest shit in the world and that person could still love the john cena meme. and thats kind of amazing when you think about it. and also, someone out there could love holocaust jokes where as you don't because you're most likely a normal human being like me.


a lot of the things i find funny should not be funny at all, and most of the jokes i tell are either terrible puns or jokes from tumblr. maybe the internet really is having a negative effect on me...oh well. 


so the next time one of your hilarious jokes doesnt go down well (unless it was something that you genuinely shouldn't joke about), don't feel bad - you're probably just too internet-y like me. maybe thats not something to be proud of.


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hey this was actually quite long, and effort went into it. so, yknow, be nice about it.

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