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Chapter 11 - drapetomania

 I remember running. 

Running away as fast as I could yet my sneakers were cemented to the ground. 

My feet forced me to face this sight while all I wanted to do was run.

My eyes glued to him kissing her. Her, everything I'm not. 

What was I hoping for?

For him to ask her out and not move on?

He moved on.

Yeah I know that brain thanks a lot.

I thought I could too. 

You're gonna.

Lies.

He just moved on faster than you did.

Figures. 

It hurts.

That's what happen when you don't listen to me. You listen to that stupid heart of your's.

It's not like I have a choice.

That's the beauty of it.

--

That night, my mind was blank yet swarming all at once. The though of him being with her. What was I expecting, she was everything I wasn't. If he could get someone like her to be attracted to him why would he even want me?

I needed a distraction, to indulge in a form of escapism somehow but everything I thought of was probably illegal and unhealthy. 

"Hey Tay..." Lynn answered.

One of my shoulders was propping the phone against my ear while my hands were changing the batteries to the TV remote.

"You haven't told me!" I shouted accusingly with joy, trying my best to hide the strain in my voice. 

She giggled loudly on the other end. She was happy. Obviously. 

"Come over?" I persuaded hoping to get my mind off things. 

"What are you talking about I'm already on my way." 

And with that she hung up leaving me shaking my head with a smile on my face. 

I let out a huge sigh and threw myself back on the couch. 

--

We were both sitting on my bed, while Twenty One Pilot's Ride boomed through the speaker connected to my laptop.

Both of us were on our third pack of chips and she had the liberty to make a Starbucks run and brought back my fav.

"You weren't there.." she paused pointing it out before sipping on her Chocolate Cream Chip frappacino.

"Ah shoot sorry, had a thing." I waved off remembering the time I went home early.

"Ray wasn't there too." She added thoughtfully.

"Keep going.." I urged while my hand was having frostbite from holding on to the cup filled with Iced Latte Extra Ice.

"We were bored after a while since there wasn't anybody else and the homework load wasn't as bad....

Ashlynn's POV (past)

A peaceful silence fell over the study room, only interrupted by the scraping of pencil lead on paper.