The misadventures of a Main Character [Complete]

XLIII - Unsuccessful napping

"Ew," Helena muttered under her breath. "Well, we have eleven or so minutes to spare. What are we going to do until then?"

"Drink some water and take a nap?" Main suggested hopefully.

Helena glared at him. "What PRODUCTIVE thing are we going to do until then?"

"Drink... lots of water, and take a nap?"

*

Ignoring Helena's frosty stare, Main emptied his water bottle and lay on the bench next to the statue, preparing to sleep. 

"Why are your eyes always so glowy?" he asked.

The zombie blinked. "When I was resurrected as a zombie, my eyes had already rotted out. Greg replaced them with these LEDs; sewed them right around my irises."

Main yawned and settled down for his power nap, while Helena explained in graphic detail the operational procedure Gregory had used. 

If town's sole clock tower hadn't been completely demolished by a freak accident involving a vampire piglet and an ensuing flamingo battalion, the clock would've tolled eleven. But it had been; so it didn't.

Absorbed in the gruesome tale, neither party noticed the approaching flamingos.

 "You there," the captain proclaimed. 

Main looked up from his unsuccessful nap. He recognized the captain by his green, paisley trench coat that rippled in the breeze. Only captains wore trench coats; everyone knew that.

Eight other flamingos circled around them, brandishing their sharpened beaks.

"I accept your surrender," the captain said smugly. "Now, put these bags over your heads and you won't be immediately slaughtered."

Helena looked to Main, who still lying on the bench. She couldn't risk him being impaled this late in the story-line. She sighed. "Fine, but I'm not putting a bag over my head. If you want to abduct us, you do it."

The captain flapped his wings angrily. "Are you crazy? Flamingos don't have opposable thumbs!"