Sparks Fly [Book Two in the "Fire And Lighting" Series]

Chapter Forty-Six- Moving On

I ran, doors with meaningless numbers flying past me. I wanted to get away, had to get away.

I turned the corner and dove into what I thought was an old supply closet, shutting the door behind me quietly a second before Emma sprinted past. I heard her sobbing my name, her cries mixing with Pyro's dark laughter.

I blinked back tears as I turned the corner to the zeta-tubes, running right into Connor.

"Willow!" There was an undertone in his voice as he grabbed my arms. Something that betrayed the joyful mask he was wearing at my well-being.

I stared at the smooth floor, unable to face him, like everyone else. "Let go."

"No. I'm not letting you run away. Not anymore." He pulled me into his arms for a hug, and I pushed away.

"This isn't running. This is recognizing when you've struck out!" I told him.

He folded his arms, giving me a doubtful look. "It looks like running to me. Sounds like it too."

I folded my arms as well, and looked away as he tried to make eye contact. "I've had my fair share of chances, and I keep hurting people, whether it's me or not. You would have kicked anyone else out several times over."

I looked away, towards the League's pretty garden. There were a few fascinating plant species from Krypton and Mars and Thanagar, where Hawkman and Hawkwoman came from. When I was younger, Wally and I loved to do tests and experiments with them. The team always looked forward to a trip to the Watchtower, but now, all I wanted to do was get away.

Connor opened his mouth to say something, but I added more. A feeling I'd been hiding ever since Finch, Robin, Rachel, and Garfield joined the team.

"And I see the way they look at me too. The younger ones. They fear me."

"Willow, please," Connor took my hand and cupped my cheek, forcing me to look at him. "Don't do this to yourself. No one else has the guts you do. This team has been through enough with loosing Wally, it can't loose another person."

I tried to shake all thoughts of Wally from my head, and ignored what he said about the team needing me. They didn't need a psychotic fire beast who could attack them and scar them at any moment.

"Bridget and Bart will be glad. I've given them scars that won't heal. I nearly killed them and Flash in cold blood."

"Hey!" Connor said sharply, giving my shoulder a shake, "That was not you. That was Pyro." Obviously he was in denial of what Pyro had told them in the Arctic.

He couldn't deny it for long. "No, not Pyro. I was in control, Connor."

To hear it from Pyro was one thing, to hear it from me was another. "Willow..." Connor whispered.

He didn't say anything more, so I continued. "I was in control the whole time and I regretted nothing. Not even ruining Bridget's sweet young face." I leaned against the wall, eyes shut and hugging myself tight, as if that would stop the tears.

I was unable to resist this time, when Connor pulled me in for a hug. I leaned my head on his chest for one last time.

"We've all made mistakes," He soothed. "I choose to take the shields from Luthor. It doesn't mean you have to leave."

I shook my head and stepped away. "But I have to. For their sake. I'm not stable, I need some space, and some time."

"Willow, please, don't go."

Connor tried to take my hand again, but I kept it clenched in a fist at my side. I couldn't get attached. I had made my decision, and I was going to stick to it.

I took a deep breath and stood up straight. Time to come to terms with things. "If you loved me at any point, you're going to let me leave."

He was confused at my choice of words. "Wha-?"

For the first time in our conversation, I looked him right in those beautiful blue eyes of his.

"I know you never loved me like you loved M'gann. I see the way you look at her. You love her. You still do, after all of that. Don't let her slip through your fingers." I smiled sadly to assure him and kissed his cheek.

"It's time for me to go. Don't forget what I said. Love is a luxury you can afford. And cannot afford to lose." I took my jacket and slipped my arms through the sleeves, taking in the rich jasmin scent.

Connor seemed to be slowly taking in what I'd said. Taking it apart piece by piece and putting it back together. At last, he looked back at me.

"If that's what you think, then fine. But remember. You are an amazing girl. Maybe you aren't meant for me, and that's fine. I know you'll find someone who is meant for you. And no matter what you do, there will always be room for you on this team, in this family." Connor leaned in, pressing his hand on the back of my neck. His lips met mine, and stayed there for six full seconds.

When he ended it, he leaned his forehead on mine. "I hope you won't forget what I said, either."

I nodded, no longer looking at him.

"I won't." Squeezing his hand, I walked to the zeta-tubes and typed in the coordinates. My finger hovered over the last key when I realized Connor was still there.

I looked over my shoulder and saw him standing there, hands in his jacket pockets, trying to keep from crying. I took a deep breath and realized I was still doing the same.

"Tell anyone who may have at one point cared that I'm sorry."

"Recognized; Wildfire, B08."

In a shower of golden light that used to surprise me, I left the Watchtower for who knew how long.

Maybe, if I had stayed just a moment longer, I would have heard Connor say something that might have changed my mind about leaving.

"We all care, Willow. You've just been blinded once more."

-------

I arrived at the Arrow cave to find it, thankfully, empty. Before I left, I took the flash drive from the zeta-computer. That should keep them from tracking me like Roy and Oliver did with Arsenal.

I walked out into sunny Star City, quickly hopping into my purple bug, conveniently parked there from weeks ago.

Where to now?

I looked down at the steering wheel gripped tightly in my hands as I took a right turn, on autopilot to home. The car would have to go. Far too recognizable, and I didn't want the League and the team tracking me.

The house was empty too, like the cave. I locked my bedroom any way, in case Dinah came looking for me. I grabbed a duffle from my closet shelf and threw in some random clothes. Jeans. Shirts. Socks. An extra pair of shoes. After a moment's consideration, I added the dress from Emma and the hairpin the Beast Twins gave me for my birthday.

One of my jeans pockets looked odd. I pulled out the contents: a crumpled-up, folded piece of paper with the word "Emma" written on it in handwriting that was clearly not my own.

I slapped my forehead "Hello Willow," I muttered. Another thing I'd forgotten. Kaldur asked me to give this to Emma, and, like my promise, I'd completely forgotten.

I looked around the room for one last time, and noticed a small notepad with the first page covered in writing from Physics homework assignment I was supposed to finish years ago. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad to leave behind a note of my own.

"Dear friends..." I started. I looked around the room for inspiration, and finally let my mind speak the words I couldn't say out loud.

Then, I tore of a new sheet of paper.

"Dear Emma," A tear dropped onto the yellow lined paper as I continued to write.

"...I'm sorry..."

It was time to move on.

I will be gone all next week, so there won't be any updates then :(