Diaries Of A Directioner

Chapter One

I dreaded going back to school, everyone hated me. Today was a week exactly, after i tried to kill myself, and my first group meeting is right after school. My mom also set me up with a counselor, she thinks i should talk to someone. But whatever, I got out of bed, and straightend my hair, put some clothes on, and brushed my teeth.

After that i headed downstairs, my mom offered to drive me, but i decided to walk, i dont live to far away from the school. When i arrived to school, people stared at me. No one said anything to me, i just walked with my head down. When i got into my first class, Sarah stared at me. When she realized i saw her, she looked away.  

"Look, the whores back. Where you been? Getting an abortion?" 

Emma said, I tried ignoring it, but i just couldnt. I got up and left, i knew today was going to be hard. But i didnt think it would be this hard. I sat.in the bathroom stall and pulled my knees up to my chest.

"That Tessa girl is back, she is a bit crazy"

"Did you hear what she did?"

"Apparently she had sex, got an abortion and then tried to kill herself"

The girls laughed and left the restroom, was this seriously what people thought actually happened? Did they really think it was a joke, and something to laugh at?

After crying in the bathroom all day, i went to my group meeting.  

"So who wants to tell us a story to start us off?" 

The group leader asked, a young boy raised his hand. 

"So, i get made fun of on a daily buisness, and its not easy. I get called nasty names." 

He said, he slouched into his chair and stopped talking to everyone.

"I know how you feel. I get called fat, ugly, and my nickname is Oger Amy." 

Another person added. I looked down, i wasnt the only one out there like this. After listening to everyone share a story, i had to go to counseling. Woooooo. When i walked in, they escorted me to a room. 5 minutes later a women walked in. 

"Hi, you must be Tessa?" 

She asked, as she sat in here chair. I nodded my head. 

"My name is Mrs. Tomlinson. Ill be you're counselor for the next month or so." 

I nodded my head, I didnt want to be here.

"So, explain your story to me. Why did you try to commit suicide?" 

After 20 minutes, i explained my story, why I hated school, how everyone made fun of me, the disgusting rumors. She didnt interrupt, didnt give me werid looks, or anything. She just listened to how i felt, and it felt good knowing someone cared about me.  

"Well, Tessa, this what i want you to do. Here is a journal, i want you to write one entry a day, explaining how your day went, what happened, and how you feel." 

She handed me a journal, and i put it in my bag. 

"Thanks." 

I said quietly.  

"Also, have you ever listened to music, with headphones in?" 

I shook my head, i havent listened to music in a while. It didnt really solve anything I guess, well I mean, I didnt know of any bands.

"When something happens, at school, at home, or anywhere, to put these in and listen to music. You can download some of your own music onto it." 

She handed me an ipod with headphones. I stuck that into my bag also.  

"I'll see you next week, okay?" 

I nodded, and walked out. I was pretty excited to have my own ipod.

As soon as i got home, i went to my room and pulled out my laptop. I went onto youtube, and searched some music artists. I listened to some Justin Bieber, Drake, The Wanted, and found a group I've never heard of, One Direction. I clicked on the link, and it lead me to a list of songs. I clicked on one called "What Makes You Beautiful" , i smiled all the way through the song. I clicked on another song, "One Thing" , it was a catchy song. I kept listening to their music, and after that i fell in love with the band. I did some research on them, and found out their names are, Liam Payne, Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Harry Styles, and Louis Tomlinson. They were all so cute too. I downloaded both albums they had out onto the ipod, and some of their other songs that weren't apart of the album. I was absolutely in love with this band.