Forbidden Love

chapter seventeen

"Are you sure you're okay?" Julian asked me again, rubbing small patterns on my lower back.

Any other time I would find this relaxing and it would make my heart flutter by his random act in kindness but instead I was annoyed.

"I'm fine," I snapped.

Julian had a frown on his face, hurt from my sudden outburst. I pretended not to notice and leaned back on my couch, my psych book open on my legs.

"I'm sure you could bring your grade up. You have another few weeks until the semester is over."

I snorted in my head. He thinks I'm upset solemnly on my grade? If only he knew my recent encounter with an arrogant yet devilishly handsome boxer he would think twice.

A week has passed and I haven't seen or heard from Tobias. Noel and Scott scheduled another dance session which Tobias failed to show up to. I heard the groomsmen had a tux fitting which he also failed to show up for. I was beginning to think that Tobias just left New York for good. It angered me. He couldn't have just left, yet where was he?

On the other hand Julian has been over my apartment every chance he could. At first it was sweet; he brought flowers and dinner. But now I was getting tired of his presence. Seeing someone everyday could do that. My feelings for him were beginning to subside. They were still there but I could tell that his feelings were much more stronger than mines were.

"Let me help you relax," he mumbled, his mouth nibbling my ear.

"I have to finish this," I complained. His touch did nothing to me. There was something missing, a spark, a fire, something. It didn't feel right anymore.

Julian cleared his throat and got up. I heard dishes clatter in the sink. He was upset. It wasn't right for me to treat him like this.

"Julian," I sighed, walking into my kitchen.

My bare feet hit the wooden floors, making me shiver. I wrapped my cardigan tightly around my body. The beginning of November proved to be bone chilling.

"I'm sorry," I spoke again.

He was looking at me as if I was a complicated puzzle, trying to figure what pieces go where. I stepped in front of him and wrapped my arms around his torso, my head resting softly on his chest. I felt his chest rise softly before his arms curled around me as well.

"Its okay," he mumbled. Just then I felt something vibrate and I saw him pull out his pager. Julian clicked his tongue and put it back in his pocket.

"Duty calls. I'll be back later tonight, yeah?"

I nodded hesitantly. "Yeah, sure. See you later."

With a soft kiss on my forehead he left, leaving me alone in my kitchen. I texted Jamie and asked if she was meeting with her study group, even though it was a Friday afternoon. I could picture her laughing at me as I read her response.

It's Friday night! Nobody's studying! But if you're really desperate I'm sure someone is in the library tonight.

Shaking my head I pulled my leather jacket over my black knitted sweater and pulled my feet into my leather boots. After packing my books into tote bag I locked my apartment door and pulled my scarf over my neck tightly.

Peter was working tonight so I didn't bother to say my goodbyes. As soon as I stepped outside I was welcomed by many walking pedestrians and taxis honking their horns impatiently. Ah, you gotta love New York.

Sticking my hand out, I signaled any taxi to pick me up. Instantly a taxi came to a halt next to me and I gratefully got in. The blasting of the heat welcomed me as I gave the taxi my designated location.

I plugged my headphones in and began put my music on shuffle. When it landed on Slow Dancing In A Burning Room my breathing hitched. Memories of Tobias holding me, his strong arms attached to my hips as if his life depended on it, entered my head. I ached to feel his arms around me again, just once. I quickly changed the song, hoping that my memories of Tobias would go away as well. How naive of me to think that it would work.

~*~

"I still don't get it," I complained, huffing my hair out of my face. "I came here to study Psychology yet in here doing Calculus work."

Will laughed at my weary expression before turning to a clean page in his notebook.

"Limits barely touch the surface of Calculus. You'll be fine," he said, bumping his shoulder next to mines. "Here look."

Will was in a great portion of my classes so when I saw him studying in the library I squealed with joy. The next half an hour he tried to explain limits to me. It was useless; I hated Math and I probably always will. You could only imagine how happy I was when I finally got a question correct.

"I'm a genius. It's official. They should call me the next Einstein," I joked, ecstatic that I actually understood the concept.

Will laughed and shut his book. "Well Miss. Einstein, I think it's time I tuned out."

I checked my phone and realized it was 12:30. I was shocked, not realizing how fast the time flew by.

"Thanks Will. I owe you big time," I replied earnestly.

Will shrugged off my compliment. "It was all you."

We parted our ways outside the library and I found myself shivering from the cold. I wanted a coffee but I knew if I drank one now I wouldn't be able to go to sleep later.

Instead I took the long way into the city. It's been awhile since I've actually appreciated the campus. It was beautiful, any Ivy League school was. With their castle like buildings and exquisite landscaping it was a no brainier that Columbia University was one of the best in New York. Best in the United States at that.

There weren't many people out tonight and I don't blame them. It was freezing, the temperature now hitting low 40s. When I heard footsteps behind me I quickly turned around, startled by the sudden noise. Paranoia must've crept onto me because there was no one behind me.

I shook my head. Last week Julian made me watch Purge Anarchy, knowing that I wasn't into horror movies. I've been going crazy, imagining people following me all week. Of course now it wouldn't be any different.

But when I saw a shadow approach behind me as I turned a corner I knew someone was falling me. I turned around swiftly, wanting to catch whoever was following me. The figure disappeared and my heart began hammering. I could feel my nerves tingling like I was being tickled with a small feather.

Frozen in my spot I wondered what I should do next. I could always confront the person but I knew I wasn't strong enough to defend myself. I was almost near the city, just a couple of more minutes.

Breathing in deeply I dug my phone out my bag and kept it in my hand just in case. I quickly began speed walking towards the front of the campus. You're just being paranoid, I told myself. Nobody's following you.

I heard the footsteps behind me once again and I began to panic. Blood rushed in my ears and my pulse skyrocketed. I clicked on a contact I didn't think I would've used in a long time.

"Tobias," I whispered, my heart still hammering. "I need your help. I think someone's following me."

"Stay there," he told me sternly. "I'm coming now."