Counsel of the Heart

11

Rebecca's pov: 

the dinner is really going well considering sam's friends are here and thankfully tee is here making me less nervous and let me tell you the food is divine! my expectation just went out the door this is just amazing! 

and i discovered alot about sam's friends, 
jim is a fashion entrepreneur who owns about 5 fashion brands here in thailand, kade is an upcoming actress in thailand thats why her face seems very familiar, and tee owns restaurants around thailand and charlotte is a model and a very beautiful one. 

talk about friends with high business statues and actresses and models. damn. 

" so miss rebecca, what made you pursue psychiatry?" charlotte asked and i wipe my mouth before i spoke. 

" please call me becky everyone, and i pursued psychiatry because i wanna help people who are struggling with their mental health. those who cant voice out their pain, their agony, their deepest fears and constant thinking of harm and trauma. and also...because of what happened years ago..." 

grandmother, nueng, song and everybody else looked at me. 

" i was....a survivor of sexual abuse and depression." they had a shock of expressions in their faces and i smile at them.

"dear, you dont need to share it with us, as it might trigger something..." grandmother said to me as she holds my hand and i shake my head smiling.

" its okay grandmother, im more than comfortable to share it with you..cause this is what started my journey in pursuing this field." 

( warning! this talks about sexual harrassment, depression and some other bad things...you can skip this part :) some of you might get triggered about this and i feel you. ) 

" i was about.....13 years old when it happened.  i was in UK since my mother wanted me to be with my biological father for a vacation. my mother remarried by the way, and so Dad had to go get some groceries since richie, my brother was in college dad trusted his friend to babysit me. " i take a deep breath and grandmother was just holding my hand tightly which i was so grateful for. 

" i was just in my room, my earphones in and reading something i wasnt facing the door thats why i didnt notice someone coming in when suddenly a hand held my mouth  and lifted me up from my bed and i look up it was his friend...." i grip grandmother's hand and Song who was beside me rub my back in comfort. 

" he touched me in places that i wasnt very comfortable with, he said that if i tell my father he would kill me....the one thing i did was kick him in his private part and punch his face and ran. i ran and ran and ran till i couldnt run anymore and thats when i called dad and richie and told them what happened....minutes later they arrived and dad hugged me tight and richie went in our house and beat dad's friend till the cops came and cuffed him up and put to jail....and after that dad made sure that he was sentenced to life in prison...but the pain and..the lingering touch was there....i developed severe depression and i wouldnt eat, sleep, or even do anything. i just lied there thinking about whether i should go on with my life or....die..." i look at grandmother and she was smiling at me sadly. 

"mom was of course very mad that that happened...and so dad...decided that i do therapy and of course me being a teenager didnt want to do it. but eventually i gave up and gave it a chance. it wasnt bad after all, i learned how to cope with my trauma, how to manage my anxiety if ever it attacks and well....i went from a victim to a survivor. thats why i pursued psychiatry." i smile and they all look at me with soft smiles. 

" you are very strong for overcoming that obstacle becky..." Nueng said and i smile. 

" you are a true warrior becky. we are very glad we met you." jim said and with a sobbing kade on her side we all laugh at her. 

" dont laugh at me! i cant believe she went all through that and now she's here sitting with us..its just so..." she hid behind jim's shoulder crying and jim rolled her eyes comforting her friend. 

" you are one of the strongest women ive met in this world becky..." charlotte said and i just chuckle at them.

" the world has been very cruel to you at a very young age dear....but im so so very proud that you are here alive and helping people with the same struggle....i commend you my dear.." grandmother said and i just smile at all of them. 

"thank you everyone.....thats why i vowed to myself that whatever happens i will help people who had the same fate as mine...same as sam's...." i said and they all clapped at me and i just blush. 

Nueng stood up holding her champagne starting a toast, " a toast! for becky surviving the biggest challenge in her life and may she succeed in many achievements she will have in her near future. another toast for my dear sister sam's recovery that she will be her old self again with the help of becky. cheers!" nueng said and we all cheered and drank our champagne. 

the rest of the night was a complete blast talking with all of them and i have never felt more happier...i have my family, i have friends, a whole lot of friends that are mind you very very high statues and a new branch of what i consider now a family.... 

it is true when they say that there are people who come  in your life that makes your existence a little more bearable and a little more enjoyable. 

Sam...really made my life a little more brighter even if she doesnt realize nor know it that she did that to me,  i just hope that in the future where she will be okay is i can tell her how i feel about her...but for now i wanna enjoy the night and enjoy the company that i have. 

i cant wait to see sam tomorrow and tell her what happened....