Lamb To The Slaughter

007

Two months until graduation.

My foot bounced anxiously as I tried to calm my mind.

I needed to calm the fuck down.

Of course, I had a plan... I always had a plan. My only worry was that my plan wouldn't get me exactly where I needed to be.

My obsession was too deep. It was carving out my heart and making me bleed shards of glass. I needed him so bad. I was afraid of what'd I'd do if I didn't get him.

For the first time in my life, I felt truly scared.

I fucking loved it.

So, back to my plan.

I was failing his class, my grades were dropping lower and lower, I stopped hanging around him as much, and I acted more stressed than I really was.

Which, of course, had a purpose.

He was a kind individual, and as much as he believed we had a normal teacher and student relationship, I knew I had him wrapped around my finger.

He'd be worried.

And he was.

Because I noticed the glances and how he'd try and ask questions out of me. It wasn't ideal to pretend to not know them or purposely get them wrong. It was even more annoying to pretend to be tired or embarrassed when the other students scoffed or laughed at me.

In reality, I didn't give a fuck what they thought of me.

All I cared about was how Seonghwa felt.

And Seonghwa missed me.

It was proven one day when I stood up from my seat, packing up my bag as the other students filed out, and he said, "Hongjoong, can you stay back for a minute?"

It wasn't hard to do what I needed to do next. Sure, did I have a different story behind my emotions? Yes. But, the emotions were the same nonetheless.

I was tired and stressed. I only had two months before I'd graduate, and I'd have no real excuse to be around him without it freaking him out.

But I also was relieved to stop avoiding him for one fucking second. My plan paid off because I could interact with him again like I missed doing.

I smiled at him, my shoulders relaxing a bit as the rest of the kids finally left. "Sure."

I kept it at that, not wanting to ask him why he needed me to stay. I didn't want to confuse him unnecessarily.

"Are you okay?" He asked, coming a little closer. I could see how distraught he looked.

He must not have realized how much I've come to mean to him. It was cute.

I sighed a bit, dropping my bag on the ground. Now... to thread the needle just right.

"Life is just...life. But we move forward. I know I've been failing this class, and I know I don't have much time left-"