Love Languages (BY: Book 2)

Have A Good Day, My Love

Lena's POV

I wake up this morning, naked in my bed but without my wife next to me. Today is my last day off but Stef has to work. The kids by now know how to handle themselves and Stef most likely boss them around a little like each morning since they still need a little bit of management.

I wish I could have wake up next to Stef though. Last night was amazing. It was the best sensation of the whole world to be close to my beautiful wife, to feel her like this and be connected again. I liked the way we talked so honestly about Franky and about what I did.

I know we are not okay still, but I guess we are moving forward. Slowly, but we're moving and that for me is so much more that I could hope for because I know Stef. She doesn't forgive just like that. And I know that I'm definitely not forgiven, but at least she wants to forgive me, she wants to try and that is enough to give me hope that maybe one day we'll find our balance again.

Right now, there's two things bothering me. One, tomorrow I have to go to back to work and I'm personally not that nervous about it, but I know that this is going to be hard for Stef because of Monte's presence there... I wish I could do something about it, but I absolutely can't and that is killing me because I so desperately want to make this easier for her, because I'm the one who put her in this situation in the first place, but unfortunately Monte is my boss, I can't afford to lose my job, so it's just the way it is...

Also, I don't look forward to seeing Monte again. Sure, we were two is this, but she played some game with Jenna that I didn't like at all. It's almost like she wanted that Stef and I break up on purpose and that doesn't sit well with me. And involving Jenna was such a bitchy move for she knew that Jenna is Stef's best friend, and now she basically stopped talking to us and I know that even though Stef doesn't talk about it, she loves Jenna, and she loves their friendship, so it chagrins her that now everything is such a mess. I feel incredibly guilty for that as well, but I know I can't let that stop me from rebuild the foundation of my marriage.

The second thing that bother me is... well... Stef hadn't said that she loves me back. She used to tell me this all the time, even more often that I do, and now, since that day at Idyllwild, not once have I heard those words. Even when making love, Stef would often stop everything just to look at me, and she would smile at me so damn softly just before telling me that she loves me... Last night, it didn't happen and that worry me a little bit...

I'm not going to say anything because I don't want to push her but well... I guess it's in my head.

Anyway, today I took the chance that no one were home to do some cleaning and laundry. Having a full house, this took almost all day and I barely have the time to sit down and chill a little that the kids are already here. So, I have to get dinner ready for them and thankfully my baby boy Jude came down to help me cut the vegetable and stuff like that.

I love spending time with him. He's so much like Stef... he maybe doesn't come from her but oddly, he has all her soft sides, every single one of them, and sure he's his own person that I love more than anything, but I guess it's very comforting to have a boy just as sweet as his mother and even Sharon says so. Apparently when Stef was little, she was a tough one, but she was so damn sensitive and that haven't change in a way, Stef is the most sensitive person I know but with time and all the rejection she had to face in her life, she became someone that shut down her feelings to protect herself. She tries so hard to hide her emotions and even if she doesn't do that much when she's with me, after what I did... it's possible that we will have to work hard on this again, for trust is a very big part of letting yourself being vulnerable emotionally...

When it's finally time for bed, I'm a little disappoint that Stef isn't here yet. She works late sometimes and even if I accepted her job a long time ago, I still don't like the danger coming with it, and I hate it even more at night.