Whispers of the Wolf

Their Loss

Managing a weak smile, I nodded. "I'm always pale, Claudia."

"That's not the point," she said sternly, her grey eyes hard. "It's cold out here, and it looks like it might rain. If you're not feeling well and you go out in this, you'll make yourself worse."

Any other time, I would roll my eyes at Claudia's fussing, but I didn't have it in me to do that today. Where her words should have been comforting in a way, they fell flat in my ears, as if my brain didn't quite hear her or register anything she said. I swallowed, feeling another shiver course through my body.

I didn't want to stay in the house, under Claudia's watchful eyes. She was already guessing that something was wrong with me and it wasn't even lunchtime yet. But I didn't really want to leave the house and brave the outside world, either.

I didn't honestly know what I wanted to do.

Apart from trying to forget about the state of my hands when I woke up last night.

I squeezed my hands into fists, gritting my teeth against the pain of my sore skin and aching fingers.

"I'd like to take a walk into town," I muttered, unsure why I said it.

Claudia cocked a brow. "And when were you going to put on your coat for that?"

"Now." I walked past her, back into the house to grab my coat from the hook by the door. "I'm putting on my coat now."

"Good." She raised her hand and touched my fevered brow. "Are you sure you want to go out, though? You feel clammy."

"I'll be fine." I offered another weak smile. Claudia pulled her hand back and narrowed her eyes at me.

"If you get sick ..."

"I won't get sick." I waved my hand as I brushed past her to cross the threshold and stand out on the front porch again. "I won't be long. I'll just go into town and bring back a hot chocolate or something." The thought of the sickly sweet drink made my stomach churn again and I swallowed, forcing down whatever was trying to come back up. I hadn't eaten since last night, but I wasn't hungry. I just ... couldn't face food right now.

Claudia cast me another glance, before shaking her head. "Alright then. Off you go." She jabbed a finger at me. "But don't take too long. And come straight back home."

Nodding meekly, I stumbled off the porch and along the garden path that led towards the road, hearing the front door close after me.

The cold wind chilled my face instantly, nipping at my fingers. The raindrops were falling a little harder, stinging my face. I pulled my hood up and huddled in my coat as I walked along the street towards the town. I kept my head down, the hood pulled low over my eyes, to block out the world.

The walk into the town was uneventful, something I would normally have been grateful for.

But not today.

Today, I needed something to distract me. To take off my mind of its endless loop that was tormenting me.

Oh my god.

Round and around in my head, different images popped up. Of racing through the woods. Chasing the wolf. Catching up, knocking it to the ground.

Then breaking its neck.

Oh my god.

Just stop thinking!

Shaking my head, I picked up the pace, hoping to outrun my thoughts.

As I neared the town square, cold prickles made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. Raising my head slightly, I could see a few people standing outside of the coffee shop, gathering around the front window despite the increasingly steady rainfall. Whereas I would have expected a lot of chatter and excitement from such a large crowd, instead I was met with quiet whispers.