Whispers of the Wolf

My Jealousy

Radley

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Anger, jealousy, tearful ... I was all of those things and I didn't know why. The more I thought about it, the angrier I became.

Head down, hands stuffed in the pockets of my jeans, I stomped down the street, my feet pounding the path in time with that one single thought.

Stupid.

Stupid.

Stupid.

I was stupid for feeling like this. What the hell was wrong with me?

Ducking my head against the bitter cold wind as it whipped by me, chilling my face and freezing my nose, I thought about what I had seen yesterday.

Alaric and Tala.

Standing on the street outside of our house.

Hugging.

Kissing.

Was I right? Were they dating?

Okay, so it wasn't a proper kiss. It was just a peck on the cheek. But still ...

I mean, Alaric had initiated both. And had seemed to enjoy it, too.

That rat bastard.

And as for Tala ...

A dull ache squeezed my chest and I took a deep breath, trying to breath past the pain. Throbbing behind my eyes told me that a headache was starting.

Oh great. I didn't need that right now.

I hardly slept last night. My mind kept throwing up images of the two of them. Holding each other. Kissing. I swear they were in front of my house on purpose... Taunting me, rubbing their relationship in my face, laughing at me.

It wasn't like I was friends with Alaric, or even Tala. I had hardly spoken to Alaric the whole time I had been alive, and I only ever really spoke to Tala when I was in the coffee shop. So why was I feeling this way now?

Stupid.

Shaking my head slightly, I carried on stomping along the main street of the town, keeping my head down, grumbling to myself. I couldn't stay in the house. I felt ... restless. I wanted to walk. Run. Just ... move. And keep on moving. Running.

Dodging a couple of people walking towards me on the street, I tripped and stumbled slightly, then righted myself, catching the couple trying to hide a smile at my clumsiness as they walked past.

I scowled at them and they spun around to scurry in the opposite direction.

Good. I wasn't in the mood for idiots today.

Marching forward, my feet hitting the concrete hard, hands balled into fists in my pockets, I felt the anger churn my stomach, snake through my body, sending my heart beating furiously.

The more I thought about Alaric and Tala, the more angry I became. And the angrier I got, the more confused I felt ... and that just led to me feeling furious.

Stupid.

Stupid.

Stupid.

I was stupid.

The whole situation was stupid. It didn't make any sense to me why I felt so strongly.

The coffee shop came into view and a surge of resentment shot through my body, fuelling my steps, pushing me forward. Hot prickles tickled my scalp and a bead of sweat trickled down my back.