The Dark Side Of The Sun

What the fuck

We got back home I immediately ran up stairs into mine and Tom's room I ran into the bathroom and threw up again and again tom came upstairs after me. "Go away" I said wiping my mouth "you never listen to goddamn thing I tell you Mel, you could have gotten yourself killed out there I can't go out tonight because of you!" He yelled at me while tightening his fists and punching the wall and walking away angry. I was used to his anger but he still scared me I wonder why it was such a big deal and why some people are after me.

I changed into a random hoodie and some shorts, I went down stairs to see where the other girls were doing, they sat on the couch watching a movie while the guys where in the office talking about something, "hey wanna watch a movie with us?" Ivy asked me "no thanks I'm gonna go to sleep"
"But it's only 8pm" Elena said "I don't feel good"  I said  walking toward the office to ask bill if he had some sleeping pills

I knocked on the office door and walked in "bill do you have some-"
before I could finish my sentence I felt so nauseous I ran to the bathroom downstairs and threw up again. What the fuck was happening to me Bill came after me "you good? What was it you were gonna say?" He asked "do you have some sleeping pills?" I asked running my fingers through my hair sighing "um yeah sure wait here I'll go get them" he said running towards his room I was looking my self in the mirror wondering why I was throwing up so much randomly

Bill gave me the sleeping pills and I swallowed them and went upstairs into the bedroom and laid down on the bed. I fell asleep quickly. I slept for some time and then I randomly woke up at night to look at the little calendar hanging on the wall, Tom wasn't in bed. It had been over a month since I'd had my period, I'd completely forgotten about that. Holy fuck I could be pregnant I couldn't be pregnant now what the hell holy fuck I froze a bit on the floor in front of the calendar before I went to dig in my closet and bags for a emergency pregnancy test, I couldn't find it in any of my bags or closet. I went into the bathroom to look through my stuff and then I finally found it, I pissed on it and waited. I am so stressed what if it's positive what should I do then I can't be pregnant Tom can NOT be a fucking dad and I couldn't be a mother I wasn't ready for that's shit I didn't dare to look at it but I had to I cried and turned the pregnancy test around to see the two red lines. It was fucking positive I was pregnant with Tom Kaulitz's child what the hell was I supposed to do now.

I am panicking, I cried on the bathroom floor with the pregnancy test in my hand. I can't tell him yet I don't know how he'll react, I went down stairs, and saw Tom sitting at the kitchen counter drinking, I stood there looking at him while crying before I pored myself a glass of water. I chugged the glass of water and looked at Tom, our eyes locked,  none of us said a word to each other. I walked back upstairs into the bedroom to try and sleep again but I couldn't stop thinking about that I'm pregnant and I don't know what to do or how I'm gonna tell Tom. I stayed up all night thinking of how screwed up this kid was gonna be.

I looked at the clock on my phone it was 5 in the morning now, everyone was probably still sleeping, Tom wasn't in bed I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth and changed into a baggy blue sweater and some grey jogging pants, I wasn't in the mood to wear something flattering or dress up like I usually do. I put my hair up in a ponytail and went downstairs to see Tom passed out on the kitchen counter. I was gonna take my car keys but then I remembered that I don't have my car anymore it's in the middle of a road somewhere, so I took Tom's car keys and took his car he would probably kill me but I had to. I drove to the nearest hospital, I didn't make an appointment or anything I totally forgot about that. I walked in to speak with the front desk lady "hi um is it possible if I get a ultrasound done?" I asked "well do you have an appointment?" She asked rudely looking down at me "um no I don't" I said "ok well what's your name "Melanie Colin" I answered "well Melanie Colin you actually have to make an appointment before showing up here without an emergency and usually the boyfriend comes with you"

What the fuck was this lady's problem "my name is actually Melanie Kaulitz yeah Kaulitz, you know Tom Kaulitz right?" I snapped at her. Her eyes widened "ohh I see I'm so sorry there must have been a miss understanding I am so sorry, of course you don't need an appointment. just follow me I'll show you where the ultrasound is" she said nervously I swear I could see the fear in her eyes.