👵Gran Review👵 (Temporarily Closed)

#R3 Winter's solace

👵》Cover
The cover is nice, to me it means that the book is all about Alyssa, and it shows that she is part of the avengers but not much else. And she looks kind of distressed so I am not sure where the solace comes from in that cover.

Personally I like the cover where you could get a feel of the story, and that it lines up with the plot and title, but I don't really get that from the cover. Though the cover is just a cover, the writing is more important!

👵》Title
The title is nice,though this is what I got from the title. Her father is a winter soldier and the book is winter's solace, so I am thinking that it's about finding comfort in distress? Or rather, Alyssa is his comfort but the story doesn't really give that feel. But a nice title though.

👵》Blurb/Story Description
The blurb doesn't really do much for the story, doesn't have hook or tension in it, mostly it's just backstory of the main character. It doesn't really tell me what the story is actually about, and reading the early parts of the chapter it doesn't feel like there is anything really going on in regards to the blurb as well.

👵》World
I think you can be a lot more descriptive because I can't paint the world in my head, even the scenes the characters are in are missing so it really is just people talking to each other with an empty backdrop most of the time. So might want to work on that so readers can be immersed into the world of the story you are telling.

I watch the avengers movie too so I know the world, but through the writing alone there needs to be more world building so readers who don't know the title can imagine what the world is like, how things work and the general feel.

👵》Plot & Conflict
I am not sure what the plot is, I think that early on the character's goal should be established so you could build tension through obstacles and conflicts which is hard to spot as the goal isn't really established early. And the blurb is vague enough that it doesn't really hook me into reading more into the story, or is it the choppy writing?

👵》Characters
The main character descriptions are good enough for me, and I can get a sense of Alyssa's personality from her interactions. Though some of the other characters don't have much description Adding more facial expressions, body language and "feel" of the characters is definitely needed because right now there is even a chapter that is practically just dialogues.

👵》Enjoyment/Engagement
The writing, feels, off? The sentences feel, choppy? Ah. The pacing, feels off, as I have to. Pause every few words. I am exaggerating with those sentences but I do feel that there is too much pause, you definitely need to improve the sentence structures in my opinion. The first chapter is hard to read purely from the way you write it, it really feels choppy.

The story does feel like it lacks breathing room, could use character introspection or showing of emotions and body languages instead of just a bit of scene and dialogues, yeah I think focus on being more descriptive to paint the world and scenes better. It feels like script writing.