The family's baby

Chapter 41

*Grace's P.O.V*

I flinch when the glass tips over, spilling on the table. I pause as I stare at it for a moment before scrambling to pick it up before it can spill anymore. It's a bit too late since the glass is basically empty now but I take my glass with me, moving it to the sink since it will now be all sticky.

I open the drawer, grabbing a washrag out of it before going back to the table. I've kind of tuned out everyone's reactions, mostly because my face is hot with embarrassment from tipping over a glass. I couldn't even eat or drink without messing up. I curse my stupid luck and my clumsiness as I try to mop up the lemonade that I had spilt.

"Grace, how about you go get another washrag and wet it? I'll try and wipe most of this off," Mom offers and I shake my head. I had to clean it up because I had made the mess. It was my fault.

"I can do it," I say quietly, not looking at her. I hear her sigh as she reaches over and moves some stuff out of the way so that I can try and wipe it all up. I'm on the verge of panicking, at least that's how it feels. I hated that I had spilt something, it was so embarrassing. No one else spilled anything, why did I have to be the one to do so?

"Grace, sweetheart," Dad says, trying to catch my attention. It doesn't work, I mean I can hear him but it doesn't catch my attention enough to make me stop wiping up the mess. I nearly jump out of my skin when Mom grabs my arm.

"Grace, I think you've wiped it all up," Mom whispers as I look at her with wide eyes.

"It was an accident," I tell her, hoping that she won't make me use a sippy cup like she had said she would yesterday. That's only partially the reason I freak out, the other reason is one I try to bury deep in my mind.

"I know. No one is mad at you," Mom reassures me as she lets go of my arm to cup my face. I lean into her touch for a second, her thumb stroking my cheek.

"That's good," I say, taking a deep breath as I slowly pull away, trying to recover my nerves. Since yesterday, it feels like my moods are constantly going back and forth. From one emotion to another and then back to the original.

"How about you take that washrag to the laundry room and take a moment to calm yourself?" Dad suggests. I nod at his suggestion, moving to go to the laundry room. I can see Elena and Zahira share concerned glances but I notice that they don't try and tease me or anything. They can clearly see how upset I am.

I step into the laundry room, shutting the door behind me. I drop the washrag into the hamper, taking a moment to gather myself. I shouldn't freak out over such a tiny mistake, everyone said that. It was just an accident... out of my control. I wish telling myself that helped. It wasn't like I liked freaking out, I just sometimes did it. It was a habit, an old habit.

My family knew that I didn't like making mistakes, I was very vocal about how much I hated messing up. However, this was different. I hadn't freaked out around any of them like this. What I hadn't told anyone, even Ashley, is that I had dated someone that was very mean to me. He never hit me or anything but he always shamed me for screwing up. Hearing that everyday, it ended up ingrained in your mind. I had broken things off about six months ago but I still wasn't over it. Not as much as I thought I was anyways.

I take a deep breath, shaking my hands as I try to soothe my racing brain. The movement helped for some reason. Most people said it was just distracting but I needed to be able to move around to soothe myself. That was why I had taken to walking around campus while reading most days. It helped me calm down and learn things at the same time.

I start to pace back and forth for a moment before I feel calm enough to go back into the kitchen. Someone had wiped down the table with a wet wash rag which I'm thankful for because otherwise it would be sticky. I get myself a clean glass from the cabinet, going back to my spot at the table.