strawberry fields | bada lee

021 | why are you so kind to me?

As you pondered, the rhythmic knock on the door signaled Bada's return- your thoughts clashed with the reality that Bada was about to come in. When she finally swung the door open, a smile illuminated her face, and her eyes sparkled with genuine happiness as they met yours.

"Let me look at you." She said, you rose to your feet, her eyes glancing at your outfit. "Such a beautiful angel... I'm glad you picked those pants with that jacket."

Bada drew nearer, her arms extending for a hug- however, a palpable pause unfolded as you hesitated, uncertainty flickering across your features, and it did not escape Bada's perceptiveness.

Her voice echoed in the room, laced with concern, as she stepped back. Her eyes once filled with warmth, now mirrored the confusion she felt. "What happened?" She inquired.

Your eyes stayed glued to the floor, unwilling to meet hers. Tears welled up at the mere thought of speaking out loud. "Why?" You uttered, the word escaping your lips like a whisper.

Bada's confusion deepened. "Why?" She said, a hint of urgency in her tone. Her instinct to comfort tugged at her, but she hesitated, mindful of how you did not want to be hugged.

You locked eyes with her, and Bada's face reflected concern- your tearful expression revealed how you felt deep down.

You nibbled on your lip as you had the courage to speak. "Why keep it a secret, Bada? Why didn't you tell me you were leaving soon?" Understanding washed over her, acknowledging that you had read through the pages of her notebook. "You can't let yourself fall for me because you're about to leave."

Bada gently reached for your trembling hand- her eyes reflected concern. "Look at me." She implored, applying a comforting pressure to your hands.

Your trembling lip betrayed your attempt to hold back tears. Bada was now in a state of mild panic. "Baby, please. Breathe in and breathe out." She encouraged you. "I know you read what I wrote, but I didn't mean it, okay? Yesterday, I poured my heart out to you, and I already told you I wanted to explore Italy together."

However, a lingering contradiction remained- the sincerity that had radiated from her eyes as she spoke about feeling a lot with you, did not match with her handwritten note.

"I know what you're thinking." She admitted as if tuned into your thoughts. "You think I wrote that recently."

You nodded- your eyes so teary you could barely see Bada. "Mhmm." You whimpered.

"Let me say something, but first, let's sit down, okay?" Bada proposed, and you followed her lead.

Bada maintained a hold of your hand as you sat on the bed. Tear tracks glistened on your cheeks, and you attempted to brush them away with your fingers. In an instinctual response, Bada, sensing your unspoken need for comfort, placed her hand on your shoulder.

Almost instantly, you wrapped your arms around her. "I'm sorry I'm crying." You acknowledged, your voice barely audible.

Bada responded by placing her hand on the back of your head, drawing you closer. "Don't worry, but listen, please." She spoke.

You rested your head on Bada's shoulder, slightly tilting it. Her hand descended to your back, the gentle patting causing the leather of her jacket to meet the skin of your exposed lower back.

"I wrote that before I even said anything to you." Bada confessed, exhaling a heavy sigh. "But, I'll admit it, I had tickets to leave Potenza."

Confusion etched across your face- she had tickets to leave?

"Even before crossing paths with you, I wanted to leave." She admitted with a nervous laugh, her fingers gently squeezing your waist. "The truth is, Potenza was just a stop while I thought where to head next. On the day I went to the restaurant, not out of any plan, but because I had no idea what to do in the city, but then, I met you."

Bada fell quiet, drawing back slightly to see your reaction. Her eyes sought yours, eager to make eye contact with you.

"The day I gave you my jersey, I was meant to say goodbye. I had plans to leave the next day, but when the time came, I just couldn't do it." Bada's gaze shifted downward, unable to meet your eyes.

This was the first time she found it challenging to look at you, weighed down by her words.

"When you told me you would be wearing my jersey the next day, with such a beautiful smile, I knew then I couldn't leave you behind. It left a knot in my stomach because I realized I wanted more." Bada said gently.

"If I hadn't mentioned it, would you have just left?" You inquired, breaking the heavy silence. "Or were you planning to stay regardless?"

Bada lifted her eyes, offering a faint smile. "I was staying." She admitted. "That entire day, it felt like you and I were something else. The way we connected, the conversations we shared, everything felt different. But when I heard you say that, it was as if something inside me clicked into place."

Overwhelmed with a mix of joy and relief that Bada had chosen to stay, you found yourself at a loss for words. In a spontaneous reaction, you wrapped Bada in a tight embrace, but she was caught off guard. The unexpected action caused her to tumble backward onto the bed, and you ended up landing on her chest.

"Oh my god!" You let out a squeak. "I'm sorry." You apologized.

Bada burst into laughter, and soon you joined in, the room filling the sound of your giggles. As Bada drew you closer, a hint of nervousness crept over you, and she could not help but notice. Your cheeks flushed slightly, reacting to the fact that Bada's hands were on your hips.

"Bada, your hands." You whispered, burying your head in her chest.

Bada playfully patted her hands against your sides, chuckling at your nervous demeanor. "Sorry, my baby."

You could feel the rhythmic beat of her heartbeat, realizing she was just as nervous as you. "Bada, on another topic, if we are going out, I need to fix my makeup."

"Can we stay like this for a bit, please?" She requested.

"Of course, baby." You answered.

As you lingered in the embrace, a sense of comfort washed over you. Bada, too, savored the closeness, enjoying the feeling of your presence against her, though you could not see her face, you sensed a subtle flustered charm in her reactions, you were too glad that Bada stayed.