The family's baby

Chapter 20

"All done, baby. Would you like to walk or be carried?" She asks as she inspects her work. When I don't immediately respond, she holds out her hand for me to take. I take it and she helps me stand. Chewing my lip, I finally make up my mind.

"Up, mommy." I tell her, letting go of her hand and holding out my arms instead. My response takes her by surprise at first it seems but she quickly recovers and smiles down at me.

"Of course, baby." Mom says as she bends down and scoops me up. Once I'm settled on her hip, she guides my head down to rest on her shoulder. I can't help but start mindlessly playing with a lock of her hair as she starts lightly patting my back. She keeps her steps small and light so I'm barely bouncing on her hip. She has a hand under my padded tush to help support me and is using her arm to help lock me in place by pressing me against her. The light bouncing and pats feel really nice, almost soothing and I find myself getting more and more sleepy the longer I'm in her arms.

"Looks like someone is most definitely ready for her nap..." Mom says softly, trying not to disturb me. The mention of the dreaded N word has my eyes snap open and I try to raise my head but my mom stops me.

"I should have known better than to mention that word." She says with a chuckle, caressing my scalp through the bonnet to keep my head on her shoulder.

"I'm not tired. I don't need no... stupid... nap." I proclaim, unable to stop the yawn that escapes me as I finish speaking.

"Of course you don't, baby. Mommy must have just been mistaken." She tells me and I can practically feel the eye roll from her tone alone. I try again to sit up but she stops her caressing to more forcefully hold my head down. Unable to win this battle of strength, no matter how hard I try, I eventually give up and once satisfied, slides her hand back down to my back to begin rubbing it in soothing circles all over.

"I don't... and I'm not a baby..." I eventually protest with a pout, earning a chuckle.

"Of course your not, you're mommy's big girl, in her big girl pullups." Mommy says and I'm about to agree before what she said registers with me and makes me blush. I hide my face in her neck and I think mom now remembers who is actually in her arms now too as her touch feels very apologetic in an attempt to comfort me.

"Do you hate me now?" I eventually ask into her neck, making her freeze in place.

"Grace... why would I ever hate you? I love you.. you will always be my youngest daughter, my baby..." She tells me, making me start to tear up.

"I can't do anything right... I wouldn't blame you... everyone else gets rid of me once I start messing up like this... I require too much effort..." I tell her, trying to keep my crying silent so she doesn't find out. I think she knows as she repositions me so I can breathe deeper a little easier.

"Oh, Grace... my poor, little baby... I don't hate you baby and you aren't leaving my side. If anyone even tries to take you out of my sight, they will find themselves very sorry. I need you to understand, your punishments aren't because I hate you. They are because I love you with all my heart and I enjoy caring for you. You, Zahira, and even my little daddy's girl because she just loves to be a pain in my... you know what, Elena, are the center of my world. No matter how old you get, that will never change, Grace." She tells me as she begins to gently sway me with a light bounce from her patting my butt. Her comment about Elena and her antics has me chuckling through my tears.

"You girls just grew up way too fast. It felt like I barely had time with you. One day we were signing to finalize the adoption papers and the next you were leaving to attend college on the opposite side of the country. To be honest, your punishments are me being selfish, baby. I missed having someone to care for and I'm taking advantage of your actions to get that back. That isn't me saying your punishments aren't deserved, Grace. You did earn them fair and square. I'm just saying I knowingly and willingly signed myself up to... baby you, in a way. At least to not treat you like a 22 year old college graduate. Maybe... it doesn't matter. The point is you can be a handful, Grace, yes... but you are my handful, Grace Dawn Santini, and that will never ever change. Do you remember what I told you before you signed the adoption papers?" She asks and I can't help but smile despite how I'm feeling.

"Yes... I do... mommy... you said that... I needed to know... beforehand... that if I sign these papers... no matter what I or you or daddy do... that I will always be... Grace... Dawn... Santini... and only death... could possibly change that. Signing meant... this... you and daddy... and Za... and even El... were my forever family, no matter what." I tell her through my tears.

I had to pause too many times because it's apparently not easy to breathe when you are both talking and crying at the same time. Mommy lets me finish though and I can feel how happy and proud that I remembered that day so well. How could I ever forget the day I officially became a Santini, though? All her children remember the days we signed our papers, afterall.

"Even Elena, huh? I'm sure she won't plan any payback for that comment, baby." Mommy teases and my body locks up thinking about what she will do if she finds out what I said about her.

"I'm only teasing, baby. I wouldn't do that to you. I know she would get her revenge if she found out you claimed to like Zahira better." She tells me and I visibly relax in her arms. I relax so much that I realize we have a slight problem.

"Mommy... bathroom... now..." is all I can tell her before hiding my face in her neck again, burning from the embarrassment of needing to ask.

"Of course you do. It always has to be after we leave the bathroom too. You can never ask while we are in the bathroom and I can never seem to remember to ask either, it seems." She says with a sigh and eye roll but still turns and heads for the closest bathroom despite her complaints.

She knows if I need to go now, I'm not making it through any type of nap and waking up dry. I can't help but start to wonder what it would be like to wake up wet in my current... predicament. It has been a while since I've worn any type of protection, afterall, but no. I am far too old for those thoughts. Wearing one is embarrassing enough. The last thing I want is mommy treating me like I'm potty training again or worse, being changed into an actual diaper! Yeah, wearing a dry pullup sounds much better...