The Queen (Harry Styles)

Chapter 29

Harry led both of us into the bedroom. He sat down on the bed and ran his hands over the cloth of his pajama pants. He licked his lips as he looked up at me with his jaded green eyes.

"Seriously, Em, I'm so sorry about-"

"I want to have a baby," I spit out before he could even finish. I could feel my stomach in my throat from being so nervous.

Harry's mouth was slightly ajar as I stood in front of him. All the color seems to have drained from his face because he looked as if he had seen a ghost. Harry just looked at me as if he had no idea what to say. He just blinked as he looked at me. So I continued.

"I know this is why we've been fighting," I started. "I've never actually said I wanted one just that we should have one to abide your mum's request, but I do want a baby, Harry. I think I've wanted it for a while and I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

He just looked at me. Every once in a while his lips would part as if he wanted to speak, but he would promptly close them once again. He ran his hands over his face as he continued to stare at me.

"Don't just let me sit here in silence," I said.

"I don't know what to say," he said, his eyes wide. "I-I understand what you're saying, but just... this is a lot to take in at two in the morning."

"I know," I said, pulling a chair in front of the bed and sitting down in it. "And I fully understand that you're probably half asleep or whatever, but I... I want this."

"What's so important that we have a baby right now?" he asked. "Why not wait a year for this?"

"Because... I don't even know. When we got married, the conversation was, and still is, a constant. Everyone seems to bring up children around us and something inside of me just kind of started agreeing with them. You also didn't help when you avoided the topic."

"I don't try to avoid the topic, Emerald," he said rubbing his hands over his face. "I just don't see why we need a baby right now. There's so much more life to live before we even think about children."

"Well, for one you need an heir," I said pointedly. "Second, don't you think life would be a whole lot worth living if there was something we shared together?"

"What's so bad about our life now?" he asked. "I genuinely want to know. I'm not avoiding the subject or anything, I just want an understanding."

"Right," I nodded. "I just... you're always so busy during the day and since I'm still learning the ropes of how to be the queen, I feel as if I need something to do. Something productive, and well, this is what I came up with."

Harry looked at me with a softened look, his face unreadable. I knew he was thinking, his eyes were going back and forth from one object to the next. It killed me not knowing what he was thinking. I just wanted to know what was going through his head. I tapped my feet as I waited for him to give me a response.

"I just-" Harry said, running his hands over his face. "I don't know! I mean, this is a human life we're talking about, Emerald."

"I know," I nodded.

"This isn't something that we can take back after we've got the baby, Emerald," he said. "And what about all the invasions we've been having? I thought you wanted to talk to a therapist about the last one?"

"I think this would help me," I said as I held my hands to my chest. "It would help take my mind off of things and I think it would help us too."

"How do you mean?"

"We've been kind of neglecting each other, H," I said slowly. "I mean, it's been like a month since we last had sex."

"I know," he said. "I am sorry about that, I've just been so busy with everything. I'm sorry, I don't mean to neglect you, it's the last thing I would ever want to do."