We've Never Been Apart This Long

All's Well That Ends Well. Or Is it?

“I’m so happy you’re gonna be okay.” Luigi tells Mimi.

“Aw, you’re so sweet.” Mimi smiles. “I’ll be glad when I can go home, take a bubble bath, and cuddle up to my hubby while I tell him all about it.”

“I still can’t believe Junior attacked you.” Luigi says.

“Think about it.” Mimi replies. “I had the DNA test on me, and yet he didn’t steal them. He didn’t wanna hurt me, he just wanted to make sure his plan wasn’t gonna fall apart because of them.”

“Then he’s just as crazy as his dad.” Luigi says confidently. “Him and that whole Koopa clan!”

“Funny that you mention that.” Mimi grins. “The Koopalings aren’t Bowser’s kids.”

Luigi’s mouth drops open. “ What ?”

“Junior swapped Bowser’s DNA with the Koopalings’ actual parents’ DNA, but he didn’t know if he’d done it in time for Nastasia to grab them. But they were never Bowser’s kids, not even when they were here.”

In seconds, Luigi’s standing up. “I gotta tell Mario.” Then his eyes go wide. “Holy stars, he just called Wario over there to sign a settlement; I think you just gave us a way to make him sign it!”

And so he hugs Mimi goodbye, and dashes out of the room, out of the hospital, and straight for their house.

“A settlement.” Wario repeats, clearly not impressed. “The charges have already dropped, and yet you’re still trying to bribe me to go away.”

“You blackmailed me.” Mario seethes. “With phony evidence, by the way, which is illegal. You’re lucky I’m not trying to throw you in jail.”

“And you think whatever those papers say is gonna cut it?” Wario almost laughs.

“Why don’t you look at the number first?” Mario holds them up again. “Can’t miss it.”

Wario takes them, and upon seeing the number, actually does laugh. “You’re out of your mind.” and throws them back at Mario. “If you’re serious about giving me a settlement, then you’d better get the Princess over here, cause that is nowhere near my promised payoff.”

“Now what’s wrong with it?” Mario demands.

”Well for one, it doesn’t come with my castle, but since that’s officially out of reach…” Wario thinks on it. “Have you spoken to Mimi or Nastasia recently?”

“What?” Now Mario’s confused. “Why?”

“Remember that DNA test I told you about? It was a match. The Koopalings are Bowser’s kids. Which means we’re planning a takeover as we speak.” Wario grins.

“And I care because…?” Mario crosses his arms.

“Because think about how dangerous it could get around here with two Koopa generations fighting! It’ll be a war the world has never seen! And I’ll be right there, profiting from it all! The explosives, the cannons, I’ll be so busy bleeding kingdoms dry from them trying to protect themselves, plenty of time to point the finger at you two for what you did to me.”

“For the love of---who. Cares?????” Mario enunciates. “All we care about is getting rid of you.”

“Then start adding more zeroes to that pathetic little number, and you get your wish.” Wario promises. “Or not, and with Bowser’s kids at my side, you will kiss your cushy little life with your brother goodbye. Permanently.”