We've Never Been Apart This Long

Where Does One Even Begin to Clean Up a Mess Like This?

"Start talking." Mario orders once Luigi's made off for their house. "What's the plan? You said we can't ask Nastasia this time, so what are we gonna do?"

"I am going to push heavily for her to be taken off of this matter altogether." Toadsworth assures him. "But coming forward with her involvement in all of this could be more detrimental than helpful. I can't in good conscience put the princess' safety at risk taking that chance, unless we have no other choice."

"Do whatever you have to do." Mario's quick to say. "I told the princess, and now I'm gonna tell you: I can't go on being separated from my brother like this."

"You should've thought of that before provoking Bowser." Toadsworth quips, no sympathy to be heard.

"He provoked us! " Mario insists. "First I lost Luigi to being brainwashed, then to the Chaos Heart, and then right when it looked like I might get to have him back after all, he almost left me again! I refuse to lose any more time with my brother than absolutely necessary."

"Master Mario, please." Toadsworth says. "All I ask is for patience."

"If that means playing nice, forget it." Mario shakes his head. "Cause right now all that means is being arrested and separated from Luigi, or living in Bowser's Castle and still separated, and I! Won't! Do! It!" Mario gets in Toadsworth's face.

"Excuse me?" Toadsworth is aghast.

Mario sighs, "Maybe it's better if me and Luigi just leave this world for good, go back to Brooklyn to be with our family."

"Master Mario!" Toadsworth says indignantly. "You just promised the committee you would obey the house arrest rules!"

"I know I did." Mario says. "And normally I'd never even consider it. But if Bowser's backing us into a corner like this..." then rubs his eyes. "I'm sorry, but I love my brother more than my life here. Please don't make me choose."

"Hey there!"

Luigi freezes as he's stopped on the path to his and Mario's house.

"Still enjoying the last taste of the daylight before being hauled away?" Wario gloats. "Where's your brother? And the princess?"

"We're on house arrest." Luigi has no patience for this. "And now I can't wait for it to start."

He tries moving faster, but Wario's too quick, grabbing his overalls.

"Hope your little vacation was worth it, cause my boss is gonna be taking at the minimum 25 years off your lives to make up for it."

"Is that supposed to impress me?" Luigi yanks himself away, not caring about the rip in his shirt. "Cause that was pathetic."

"If you'd just played nice, we'd all be living happily ever after right now!" Wario says. "But no. You just had to steal the princess away from her husband."

"You mean the wife that thinks her husband is lower than pond scum?" Luigi snaps back. "And will never give him heirs no matter what tricks either of you try? And it's not like he's such a catch, either."

"Shut up." Wario clenches his fists, ready to use them at a moment's notice.

"STOP!"

The new voice only barely makes them comply, as Mimi comes up to get between them to shove them away from each other.

"Stay the heck away from him." Mimi orders Wario, then turns to Luigi. "Wanna tell me what's going on here?"

"Classic. Can't even fight your own battles." Wario laughs.